🧵 Artificial intelligence

Anonymous at Sun, 31 Mar 2024 04:44:34 UTC No. 16105894

"Good evening, everyone! Great to see so many people here tonight. You look like you're ready to have a good time, or maybe you just needed an excuse to avoid doing laundry. I get it, choosing between folding clothes and literally anything else is the easiest decision I've made all week."

On Food Trends:
"And what's with all these new diet trends? Keto, Paleo, Vegan... I tried going vegan once. It was a very intense half-hour. My main issue with veganism is having to break up with cheese. I'm not strong enough for that. Cheese is the only thing in my life that's never let me down. Well, except when it's on top of a pizza that's too hot. Then it's just betrayal in every bite."

On Dating:
"Dating has changed, hasn't it? Online dating is a minefield. My friend told me to try it out, said it's a game-changer. The only thing it changed was my data usage. You spend hours swiping left, swiping right... It's like a thumb workout. And then, you finally find someone interesting, but their profile says, 'fluent in sarcasm.' Great, as if understanding people wasn't hard enough, now I need a decoder."

On Fitness:
"I joined a gym recently. Not to work out, just for the free Wi-Fi. But then I saw they had a new class - yoga for beginners. I thought, 'Why not? How hard can it be?' Famous last words. The instructor's there like, 'Now, gently move into the impossible pretzel.' I'm on the mat, trying to figure out which leg is left, and wondering if my health insurance covers self-inflicted yoga injuries."

Closing:
"Alright, folks, that's my time. Remember, life is too short to fold fitted sheets. If you take anything away from tonight, let it be that. Thanks for being such a great crowd, and don't forget to tip your waitstaff - they know what you did to those napkins. Goodnight!"

I asked Chat GPT to make me a stand up comedy routine ; and its absolutely terrible. Checkmate AI, the human element is required for actual intelligent design.