🧵 /sumo/ - Off-Basho General
Anonymous at Mon, 15 Apr 2024 21:07:13 UTC No. 194268
Power rankings edition
>Schedule:
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnTicket/yea
>Banzuke:
http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.
>All the sumo links and how to watch live:
https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d
Previous thread: >>191535
Anonymous at Mon, 15 Apr 2024 23:46:46 UTC No. 194295
>Asashoryu has cancer
well that sucks.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 00:57:40 UTC No. 194310
>>194295
If only there were a weight limit....
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 01:10:31 UTC No. 194314
>>194310
Does he have weight based cancer or something?
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 01:20:43 UTC No. 194316
>>194314
Yeah, cancer of the heavy, heavy Mongolian testes.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 06:22:13 UTC No. 194350
Has anyone done a Hunger Games with the Makuuchi sumotori? It'd be a funny thing to do maybe.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 07:45:31 UTC No. 194359
>Asashoryu dresses like me.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 09:22:27 UTC No. 194366
It has now been a full week since Chris's last video, this is the longest Chris absence in memory, so its safe to say that he must've died, probably of vax cancer
RIP Chris, you will never be forgotten.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 09:38:19 UTC No. 194367
>>194366
>anon isn't a Chris Sumo fighting spirit patron getting the inside scoop on Takatoriki's latest ramblings
Sad!
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 11:25:26 UTC No. 194371
Why doesn't the UK have any sumo scene ;_;
Seems like a great recreational sport
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 12:28:02 UTC No. 194380
>>194268
As a guy who isnt knee deep in the sumo scene, why is one guy in F tier just called lucas
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 15:21:18 UTC No. 194390
>>194371
i think them NORF lads would be pretty good at it, with the training and the motivation
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 16:30:36 UTC No. 194394
>>194371
It does, Eddie Hall did a video a few months ago where he visited a sumo club. Hopeless jobbers, of course, but UK amasumo does exist.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 17:32:09 UTC No. 194399
>>194394
That's like the only sumo club in the country..I saw it
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 22:52:11 UTC No. 194426
>>194400
>cool domain name
>no SSL
Damn.
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 22:53:59 UTC No. 194427
>>194400
Yeah unless you live nearby then enjoy traveling 3+ hours to get there lmfao
Anonymous at Tue, 16 Apr 2024 23:13:47 UTC No. 194431
>>194427
Make your own club then. There's no law against meeting up with your friends in a public park and doing sports.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 00:05:43 UTC No. 194435
>>194426
The old site was pure web 1.0 kino with that one gif with the dragonball sfx looping constantly at the header of the homepage
>>194427
No skin off my nose. I could get to either club on a single bus ticket.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 01:11:23 UTC No. 194442
fuck I miss summo
where is the summo
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 02:04:44 UTC No. 194448
>>194442
There have been two jungyo videos posted last thread.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 02:15:04 UTC No. 194451
>>194448
jungyo isn't sumo
it's like ice skating vs hockey
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 02:44:52 UTC No. 194454
>>194452
>Hakuoho above Takerufuji
Nah. Nah.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 03:17:47 UTC No. 194458
>>194454
They're on the same tier though?
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 06:12:56 UTC No. 194469
>>194452
Did you remove Ay Güey? I always thought it was funny to see Hakuoho go go up one whole rank when he takes his bandages off, just enough to be higher than Gonorrhea. That match was kino.
>Lost the playoff to Gounoyama last basho
>Fights all of the basho with the bandages
>The day comes, Hakuoho vs Gounoyama rematch
>He removed his bandages for that match
>Wins with ease
>Next day he has his bandages back on, for the rest of the basho
That was some anime shit right there. You should add Ay Güey back to Rank C.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 06:29:32 UTC No. 194471
>>194469
I removed many of the multiple forms including base form Ay Güey for the sake of space. It was fine in the beginning for everyone to have 3 powerups, but there's just not enough room anymore.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 08:36:06 UTC No. 194476
This is Spiffy's estimate banzuke. First time in a while that I didn't see someone in the lower rankings that look like they deserve to to be way higher and could threaten for the cup by having a massive first week.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 09:34:47 UTC No. 194481
>>194452
We need to start adding the new ozeki to E tier when they start choking
>Tetas Quatro (Kotozakur-ACK!)
>Discipulo de Kakuryu (Discipulo de Kakuryu)
I can't come up with anything for Hoshoryu
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 09:59:20 UTC No. 194483
>>194452
Why is that one guy just called Lucas? Please enlighten OP
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 11:19:49 UTC No. 194485
>>194431
Actually if you scare anyone you can commit a public order offence. Wrestling/sparring will scare weak hearted people enough to call the police
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 12:03:00 UTC No. 194488
>>194484
ahhh, thanks. didnt know there was a rishiki with the name lucas kek
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 12:26:27 UTC No. 194489
>>194485
I guarantee that nobody is going to be intimidated by Anon's sumo club.
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 13:33:42 UTC No. 194492
>>194488
There's not. Read the post again.
>Lucas (on the chart) IS (the) recently retired TERUTSUYOSHI,
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 14:05:59 UTC No. 194494
>>194492
Could you dumb it down a little more, for the layman?
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 14:16:06 UTC No. 194497
>>194479
jej
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 14:38:29 UTC No. 194499
You Schrishzoids can go to bed now, he is alive and well
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 19:06:41 UTC No. 194525
>>194507
>How could you give your own fellow ozeki the ol' salty chikara-mizu?
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 19:24:44 UTC No. 194528
>>194492
>there's no rikishi called Lucas
https://sumowrestling.fandom.com/wi
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 20:40:15 UTC No. 194535
>>194492
ah, im really stupid, thanks bro
>>194528
>Sandanme
hope he will pull a tochinoshin
Anonymous at Wed, 17 Apr 2024 21:49:23 UTC No. 194542
rip Akebono
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 03:22:15 UTC No. 194567
The new Chris episode is truly fantastic, I'm so happy that the rumors of Chris's demise have turned out to be false
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tox
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 07:41:27 UTC No. 194588
>>194525
audible snort from me
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 18:25:46 UTC No. 194626
>>194380
Many of the jobbers don't get ring names until they get to a level where they might become somebody. It's far from unusual.
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 18:27:22 UTC No. 194627
>>194431
>>194485
>Oi! 'Ave you lads got your obesity loicense then?
>We're in Bri'ain, ain't we?
>all laugh
>the cop shoots the wrestlers
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 18:34:50 UTC No. 194628
>>194627
>british police having guns
0/10, broke all immersion
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 18:43:47 UTC No. 194629
do you HAVE to be part of some stable to compete in sumo?
just theoretically if some freak mountain man decide he's gonna try it out would he be allowed?
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 18:47:50 UTC No. 194630
>>194628
The armed response unit is the only part of the English police that gets proper funding. We take croime very seriously here.
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 19:03:56 UTC No. 194631
>>194630
>We take croime very seriously here.
Then why are your restaurants still open? Haha!
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 19:12:01 UTC No. 194632
>>194629
>do you HAVE to be part of some stable to compete in sumo?
Yes. Before Japan was fully urbanized, it was literally the wrestler's second home as the "stable" provided housing, food, and proper supervision, in addition to sumo training. Even today, stables are also the ones that organize living and training for the tournaments outside of Tokyo.
🗑️ Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 21:19:12 UTC No. 194648
>>194629
Amateur and international sumo are available for people that can't, or don't want to try for a slot in a traditional Japanese sumo stable.
Japanese Osumo requires all rikishi to be part of a stable.
Anonymous at Thu, 18 Apr 2024 21:57:28 UTC No. 194657
>>194650
I see you know your judo well.
🗑️ Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 01:58:10 UTC No. 194668
>>194650
lmao, her girlrunning after him with her arms out and hands clenched like she was fourteen is the funniest shit
For real though, women shouldn't be cops.
🗑️ Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 02:32:10 UTC No. 194674
>>194668
>is the funniest shit
I don't think there's anything funny about it at all. Those fucking bitches are supposed to defend citizens from criminals, and western society is so pussywhipped they'll risk citizens to placate that fat bitches, and ALL womens, egos. Same thing with soldiers and firefighters.
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 06:33:06 UTC No. 194686
>>194666
Looks like something out of a gachimuchi remix video
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 09:23:28 UTC No. 194703
Abi & Terao eating chicken wings
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ab
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 11:42:40 UTC No. 194711
>>194650
at least they're cute.
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 18:00:58 UTC No. 194736
>>194452
>Musashimaru
>Saigo
I don't get it
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 18:17:17 UTC No. 194737
>>194650
British police is in state bc of uk politics-i hate throwing that word around but they are focusing on diversity amd politics instead of competence and good training. Its becoming the norm in western europe, although the british isles got it worse.
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 21:02:33 UTC No. 194763
New Sumo Plime Time
Chris could never
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sou
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 22:37:17 UTC No. 194786
>>194763
Chris has produced 11 videos since the end of the Osaka basho, Hiro's worthless lazy ass has produced 2
Anonymous at Fri, 19 Apr 2024 23:27:18 UTC No. 194791
>>194786
High budget, occasional videos with one-on-one interviews > Chris reading off the newspaper and reading the minds of the NSK boomers set to random footage of jungyo or the last basho.
Anonymous at Sat, 20 Apr 2024 00:22:46 UTC No. 194802
>>194786
Hiro's been busy being the JSA's secret hidden camera operative gathering footage at Miyaginobeya to bring down Hakuho.
Anonymous at Sat, 20 Apr 2024 01:30:08 UTC No. 194818
>>194786
the myth of the hardworking japanese is just a meme, hiro spends his days at the pachinko parlor and his evenings getting drunk at the karaoke bar, then he sleeps in, has a leisurely breakfast and does it all again the next day. he probably "works" one or two hours a day at most. chris works hard and produces because he isn't japanese
Anonymous at Sat, 20 Apr 2024 12:13:12 UTC No. 194860
>>194786
Quality > Quantity. Also Chris would literally kill someone and frame Hiro if it means he would take his spot.
Anonymous at Sat, 20 Apr 2024 14:53:03 UTC No. 194867
>>194860
I like Hiro, but let's not pretend that SPT is high quality. His backstage access is good, but incredibly underutilised, and the whole series is shockingly amateurish for an official production.
🗑️ Anonymous at Sat, 20 Apr 2024 23:22:13 UTC No. 194898
>>194878
I hope so. Dude's a family man. Hopefully he's been smart with his earnings in case the NSK actually does boot him.
Anonymous at Sat, 20 Apr 2024 23:48:03 UTC No. 194901
https://www.instagram.com/p/C5-Y4_U
ugly bastard bros...
Anonymous at Sun, 21 Apr 2024 01:58:52 UTC No. 194908
>>194878
Did it once.
🗑️ Anonymous at Sun, 21 Apr 2024 07:34:55 UTC No. 194927
>>194925
Are Mongolians the Blacks of sumo?
Anonymous at Sun, 21 Apr 2024 16:19:34 UTC No. 194944
>>194268
you guys know sumo is rigged right?
Anonymous at Sun, 21 Apr 2024 16:21:34 UTC No. 194945
>>194927
fuck that even mean?
Anonymous at Sun, 21 Apr 2024 20:53:06 UTC No. 194972
>>194898
>Buys a parking lot in an exclusive area for $10mil to set up his future stable
About those earnings...
🗑️ Anonymous at Sun, 21 Apr 2024 21:08:00 UTC No. 194975
>>194972
>parking lot in an exclusive area
In Tokyo, that might actually be a pretty good investment.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 02:44:40 UTC No. 194992
banzuke in less than 200 hours
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 03:04:36 UTC No. 194995
>>194992
gonna be my first time seeing it in person, I'm excited
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 09:18:34 UTC No. 195015
>>194995
>this nigga bought tickets to see the banzuke
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 09:48:11 UTC No. 195016
I put a banzuke on my wall. Am I a weeb, now?
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 10:07:07 UTC No. 195017
>>195016
only if you have a katana
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 11:50:04 UTC No. 195018
https://www.nikkansports.com/battle
lol. lmao
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 12:19:22 UTC No. 195021
>>195018
If Kisenosato and Onosato are not made to commit seppuku immediately it proves the NSK bias against Mongolian rikishi/oyakata.
🗑️ Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 13:10:52 UTC No. 195022
Watch
https://youtu.be/9FmmpY1wdSo
This
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 13:52:28 UTC No. 195024
>>195015
they said I can put my initials in the bottom corner
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 14:11:00 UTC No. 195025
western sumo viewers like to say
>ugh sumo is such a backwards barbarian culture filled with violence which is tolerated at all levels. it MUST be modernised and the violence severely punished
yet they also like to say
>woooow so hakuho gets punished just because he tolerated abuse in his stable. just more anti-mongolian racism. sumo is such a backwards barbarian culture filled with racism
what exactly is their fucking problem?
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 14:20:18 UTC No. 195027
>>195019
>>195021
>"underage" drinking
Nothingburger. Japan needs to unfuck their backwards laws, drinking age is lower than 20 everywhere in the civilized world.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 14:20:48 UTC No. 195028
>>195019
More like Oh no sake
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 15:14:16 UTC No. 195033
>>195025
Worse cases were punished much less severely. They're making an example out of him
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 15:55:43 UTC No. 195035
>>195033
Westerners need to understand that not being in his own home (it's called a "heya" for a reason) is itself much worse, as it demonstrates a complete lack of desire to properly supervise and coach his wrestlers, which should be his full time job. A one-off case of bullying at any other stable can be seen as a one-off that will be properly corrected. But a shisho who doesn't live in his own house and barely shows up at all creates a situation where such corrections cannot be made without the shisho himself being first corrected.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 15:59:55 UTC No. 195036
>>195027
Onosato looks like the type that would buy alcohol for underage drinkers anywhere in the world.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 16:12:29 UTC No. 195037
>>195036
he's a good lad. we had a guy like that when we were young.
funny thing that he was also underage, but big as fuck with full beard at 15 so nobody was asking for id.
i will root for onosato now.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 16:34:21 UTC No. 195039
Heard Onosato is also one to make a toast to the hoes
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 17:21:24 UTC No. 195042
>>195019
At times I do wonder if there's some weird collusion with baseball to ensure sumo dies and Baseball can become the new national sport. It really seems like the JSA does everything in its power to scare off up and comers or ensure they want to quit, or even forcing them to. Hard to get new blood when you keep cutting yourself to bleed more. Also did he provide the alcohol at all?
>>195025
I think the Hakuho punishment was retarded because it just punished the wrestlers who already had to deal with that shit. Many had shitty records last basho because they couldn't train or do shit while the JSA jerked off about how to fuck them over. If your punishment ends up punishing the victims, it may be fucking retarded.
Honestly if it was such a big deal they should have brought legal consequences. Maybe Hakuho would care more if he was facing jail time.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 17:30:25 UTC No. 195043
>>195042
If you presented a choice to every elder stock holder, either
a) sumo dies the way it is, or
b) sumo survives but with substantial changes to the elder stock system and the heya system which might include a loss in decision-making and discretionary power for individual elders
A substantial number of elders would prefer it dies, as the system of stocks and stables means more to them than simply the existence of professional sumo wrestlers. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but the truth is most of those involved in overseeing grand sumo identify at least as much with the institution as with the sport, if not more.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 18:09:31 UTC No. 195049
>>195043
Being the people to end a several hundred year old sport would sure get you in books. Not in a good way
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 18:32:50 UTC No. 195052
>>195049
Would you rather be the last king, or never be a king at all?
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 18:34:53 UTC No. 195053
>>195042
Most of sumo's appeal is in the tradition, as it's considered an "acceptable" way for Japanese to enjoy feudal-era culture, being one of the few things to survive both the Meiji-era modernization and the post-war Americanization. While the sport is still legitimate competition, it's also half performance art, and any Japanese who gets into it knows it. it's like young girls who still become traditional geisha, or boys who become traditional kabuki actors. You put up with the traditional aspects because that's what you signed up for, and what the audience wants to see.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 20:15:55 UTC No. 195062
>>195060
>average /sumo/ reading comprehension on full display
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 20:19:55 UTC No. 195064
>>195062
>average /sumo/ poster understanding of Japanese sumo
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 20:52:31 UTC No. 195068
>>195066
Might as well put him on the ranking chart already.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 20:54:21 UTC No. 195069
>>195068
Can he pick up a Go board?
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 22:36:15 UTC No. 195079
>>195066
>>195068
Considering how much pain Teru constantly lives with and he probably won't live to see 60, I don't know that he would necessarily want his kid to go into sumo.
Play basketball or something, kid.
Anonymous at Mon, 22 Apr 2024 23:50:49 UTC No. 195088
>>195035
>Westerners need to understand
Are you not a Westerner?
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 00:01:31 UTC No. 195090
>>195052
I think Constantine XI would rather not be a king in that situation
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 01:44:05 UTC No. 195094
I became starved for sumo content during the massive interbasho doldrums so I decided to check out the older end of Chris's massive archive of sumo content and I found some good material that satiated my appetite. He has all sorts of neat stuff buried in his older content, what particularly turned me on was Chris's coverage of the elementary school and jr high championships. He has films of Hakuoho and other up and coming sumotoris back when they were just little kids.
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 09:28:03 UTC No. 195114
>>195094
He deleted a huge amount of stuff when he rebranded to "Chris Sumo", but I have no memory of if any of it was valuable footage or not. I know a lot of it was him sitting in a chair reading his translation of sumo newspaper articles into the camera.
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 13:03:02 UTC No. 195118
>>195086
would it be a foul if i fought oho and grabbed and twisted his big mole?
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 16:14:44 UTC No. 195130
Manlet sistets......I don't feel so good
Can we dig up some glued wallets? Can we shoah his knees like Terunofuji? What can we do?
We cannot suffer living under the fear of this humiliation for a decade.....we just cant.....
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 16:40:30 UTC No. 195135
>>194968
the little dude just signed with Sadogatake this week; he'll be the shortest rikishi since WWII.
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 17:56:57 UTC No. 195142
>>195135
Motomura vs Onosato:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2N
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 19:02:45 UTC No. 195151
>>195142
Hattorizakura had more fighting spirit than Hokuseiho Sr. there. Such a waste.
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 19:16:16 UTC No. 195154
>>195146
glorious chops
Anonymous at Tue, 23 Apr 2024 22:41:11 UTC No. 195175
KWABtani intai.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 01:24:16 UTC No. 195187
>>195175
Sorry I don’t speak /xs/ You’re going to have to narrow it down some.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 01:51:59 UTC No. 195191
>>195187
He means Otani from Miyagino. He was one of the two who left with the move. He flouted custom a lot and probably wasn't going to make it, so it's not a shocker.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 04:08:54 UTC No. 195200
https://www.dailyshincho.jp/article
An in-the-know member of the Nishonoseki kouenkai speaks to Daily Shinchou.
>Apparently, the 19 year-old rikishi entered the bathing area, and Oonosato followed him in with alcohol and demanded he drink. Oonosato wouldn't take no for an answer, and made the wrestler drink a huge amount of alcohol to the point that he passed out, which Oonosato thought was very funny.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 04:38:08 UTC No. 195206
>>195195
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Olo
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 08:48:51 UTC No. 195220
>>195219
https://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 11:48:15 UTC No. 195222
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 14:48:43 UTC No. 195226
>>195200
>19 year old getting drunk
The horror...Lock this monster up and throw away the key.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 15:13:52 UTC No. 195228
>>195200
bully onosato
time to close nishonoseki and demote owners and coaches
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 15:59:52 UTC No. 195230
>>195200
I'm getting white knight tumblr SJW vibes from this.
>SHE WAS ONLY 17 YEARS 364 DAYS 23 HOURS 59 SECONDS OLD YOU SICK PEDOPHILE FUCK!
Like, who the fuck cares?
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 16:01:39 UTC No. 195231
>>195226
You wouldn't like it if a man the size of Onosato decided to fuck with you for his own amusement. It's not about the drinking, according to the rumours, it's about yet another hazing/bullying incident. Nishonoseki seems to have done the right thing and reported it prompty and of his own volition, rather than letting it escalate and cause rikishi to quit, or trying to cover it up.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 16:02:06 UTC No. 195232
>>195230
How would laws work in your world, without hard cutoffs?
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 16:50:30 UTC No. 195234
>>195231
>worst yokozuna is a good oyakata
>best yokozuna is a terrible oyakata
Total Japanese Victory
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 21:20:19 UTC No. 195249
>>195247
He should get his back fixed first
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 21:23:02 UTC No. 195250
>>195249
I doubt he'll need it for amateurs.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 21:47:17 UTC No. 195252
>>195250
I think he would need to be able to stand up to beat an amateur
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 21:55:01 UTC No. 195255
>>195252
Ichinojo with a 4 month break won juryo and makuuchi yushos. He'll have a year and a half break by the time he next competes going against scrubs.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 22:27:00 UTC No. 195260
>>195255
That's true, but "barely able to stand" Ichinojo is more likely than not to return if he continues to do any training at all. If I remember correctly, he retired not too long afterwards in large part because the back problems took a turn for the worse after he won those yusho.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 22:42:04 UTC No. 195261
>>195260
He doesn't need to do any training, he can just show up and look impressively authentic while a lesser talent obligingly jobs for him. American sumo is sports entertainment.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 22:50:44 UTC No. 195262
>>195261
It takes literally one fat guy charging into him at full speed at an awkward angle to bring back the worst of his chronic pains. It doesn't matter what you think of American sumo.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 23:18:27 UTC No. 195263
>>195262
Of course there's a possibility of aggravating his chronic issues. That's fine, as long as he makes enough money doing the performances. Even if he can barely walk they'll pay him just to show up and be huge.
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 23:25:12 UTC No. 195264
Onosato to miss May basho with some sort of an injury excuse
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 23:27:49 UTC No. 195265
>>195255
>i think i'll just lie around and get drunk for a year and a half without doing any training and then immediately jump back into competitive athletics
Anonymous at Wed, 24 Apr 2024 23:42:04 UTC No. 195267
where banzuke
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 02:11:10 UTC No. 195279
>>195231
>rather than letting it escalate and cause rikishi to quit, or trying to cover it up.
This is the victim. The incident was in early September. Clearly didn't report it fast enough. For clarity, he's 19 now - 18 at the time.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 02:16:16 UTC No. 195280
>>195247
Not bad. Good on ol' Ichi for finding a job that's not "chanko restaurant."
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 03:49:48 UTC No. 195286
Banzooks!
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 03:52:06 UTC No. 195287
Chris is using the Onosato business as an excuse to screech about his cringe SJW politics and invent imaginary racism to get upset over so he can virtue signal about how woke he is.
No wonder the guy got kicked out of England
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 04:51:23 UTC No. 195293
>>195287
I heard Chris was removed from the kokugikan 109 times. pls confirm
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 05:06:07 UTC No. 195294
>>195293
This week, or....?
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 05:55:30 UTC No. 195297
>>195279
Did he stop showing up to tournaments after the hazing?
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 08:04:04 UTC No. 195300
>>195297
Might have gone back to his parents but not be formally retired yet because Kisenosato is hoping he might change his mind and come back.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 14:19:05 UTC No. 195314
>>195293
And every single time, it was the venue's fault, right?
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 14:51:58 UTC No. 195317
what's the lore on this chris guy
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 15:31:37 UTC No. 195326
>>195317
English teacher who thinks himself a sumo journalist. Posts his sometimes-biased translations of sumo news articles as YouTube videos. Occasionally spends time lurking outside of heyas filming and gets asked to stop or leave. Claimed credit for Sumo Prime Time because he yelled something about English content at a sumo director. Apparently lost his connection with Gunning years ago over his choice to continue being friends with a person who stalks sumo wrestlers(?)
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 19:30:34 UTC No. 195342
>>195200
I would drink myself into a coma if onosato wanted to drink with me.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 21:00:38 UTC No. 195351
>>195342
onosato wanted to get that kid drunk so he could rape him
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 21:06:40 UTC No. 195352
>>195351
Chris was that kid in a sumo disguise, he will show us his giant asshole in the next video as proof.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 21:11:57 UTC No. 195353
>>195351
I don't think he raped him, but I honestly think that something happened beyond
>Onosato lol'd and then went back to training
The idea he didn't fuck with the kid at all is hard to believe.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 22:24:17 UTC No. 195362
>>195353
I think if Onosato did anything truly nefarious he'd have been pulled from the jungyo or not allowed to go in the first place. It is funny when someone can't hold his drink, and there's no way that the other lads at the stable were unaware it was going on, so there wouldn't be an opportunity to do anything particularly grim. I'm prepared to accept this as standard hi-jinks, and the trouble is more due to the fact that Japan is very anal about underage drinking.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 23:37:49 UTC No. 195365
>>195336
>some random redditier hates Chris
That pretty much goes to show you what insufferable bores those who tend to dislike Chris are.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 23:39:09 UTC No. 195366
>>195351
Hokuseiho was also sexually assaulting his victims
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 23:44:49 UTC No. 195367
>>195366
So... it was HOT glue?
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 23:45:39 UTC No. 195368
>>195365
Dudes got a Wikipedia page... doesn't seem so random.
Anonymous at Thu, 25 Apr 2024 23:59:36 UTC No. 195369
>>195336
>regular victims of that other person
Does anyone know who this is? And what the hell did Chris even do back in the day?
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 00:53:40 UTC No. 195374
>>195372
More than you'll ever have, Chris.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 01:19:30 UTC No. 195377
Anybody wanna talk about sumo
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 01:33:45 UTC No. 195381
>another copy of the nihon sumo-shi up for sale
>yen is weak as hell
Have to resist...
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 02:58:30 UTC No. 195389
>>195381
>nihon sumo-shi
Care to elaborate for a newfag?
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 03:04:51 UTC No. 195391
>>195389
It's a really awesome history of sumo compiled into two big books. There's a guy in either these threads or maybe only the /sp/ threads who occasionally posts cool stories and pictures from it.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 03:10:48 UTC No. 195393
>>195391
And it's rare or something?
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 03:12:29 UTC No. 195394
>>195393
it's expensive at least
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 03:15:15 UTC No. 195395
>>195394
I take it this isn't it?
https://www.asiabookroom.com/pages/
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 03:19:40 UTC No. 195397
>>195395
nope
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 05:37:31 UTC No. 195405
it's over
https://news.yahoo.co.jp/articles/3
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 05:43:21 UTC No. 195406
>>195397
Thanks for elaborating.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 05:47:29 UTC No. 195408
>>195405
I can't believe that Asanoyama has tragically died in a roof collapse at a hostess club
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 06:10:54 UTC No. 195412
>>195406
It's two gigantic volumes which reproduces every historical banzuke ever, all known(?) hoshitori-hyou, and provides what is intended as a critically minded complete history of the sport. The pages are each over a foot long and look like this.
There were meant to be three volumes, as the first covers ancient sumo (800s) through Edo and the second is Meiji to the start of Shouwa, but the author, Sakai Tadamasa, died before finishing the third.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 06:18:42 UTC No. 195416
>>195365
>random redditor
That's John Gunning. He works for NHK. He's on the Sumo Preview show they do a week before every basho.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 06:24:59 UTC No. 195417
>>195412
ty
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 08:17:35 UTC No. 195428
>>195417
I should have also said, there are only 1,000 copies of its original run; and it looks like there has only been one reprint, in 2017 (original run was in 1956). I have never seen a reprint copy outside of this photo, so I'm not sure how many of those there are either.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 08:20:36 UTC No. 195430
>>195428
https://amzn.asia/d/hqu1PCA
Bit steep.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 11:36:17 UTC No. 195439
>>195430
honestly if i weren't trying to save for my trip there I'd definitely get it. i'm not really sure how uncommonly it appears for sale online, though.
Anonymous at Fri, 26 Apr 2024 14:47:55 UTC No. 195450
>>195267
>where banzuke
April 30
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 02:55:29 UTC No. 195507
>>195366
>>195367
They do say that the asscheeks are nature's wallet...
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 04:06:42 UTC No. 195524
According to the latest Chris video, it looks like Teru is going to be showing up for the May basho to give out kinboshis during the first week if he makes it past the komusubis in the first couple days. Apparently he has lost 20 kg and hasn't been training until recently other than weightlifting.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 04:23:05 UTC No. 195526
>>195524
>According to the latest Chris video
fuck off
>Apparently he has lost 20 kg and hasn't been training until recently other than weightlifting.
gee I wonder where he got such specific information oh he's exact-quoting a sponichi article
https://www.sponichi.co.jp/sports/n
Nothing is "according to Chris". Nothing is ever according to Chris.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 04:25:12 UTC No. 195527
>>195526
>influenza and diabetes
Oof.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 09:03:48 UTC No. 195534
>>195524
Who is going to let Terunofuji retire by ascending to Yokozuna? How long will it take? Will he be another barbarian Mongol?
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 09:05:45 UTC No. 195535
>>195534
Not gonna happen. There will be no Yokozuna for a time, and then someone will ascend.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 10:38:27 UTC No. 195538
>>195531
The problem is he refuses to cite his sources beyond occasionally saying
>_______, according to the Asahi Shinbun.
And does so in a way deliberately constructed to make it sound like most of the video's text is personal research, rather than translated & paraphrased newspaper articles. Let's look at the script of the video we're discussing:
>Terunofuji returned to practice bouts on Thursday 25th on the Kisarazu leg of the April tour, calling out oozeki Kirishima and going 5-3. It was very much a test run of his yokozuna frame, according to Sponichi. "I'd rather call it a gentle workout," said the man himself. "As Kirishima has had neck trouble, we had to take things steady. My own muscles still feel tight, as it's been all weights and no bouts for the past few weeks. Not bad for a first day back," was his initial verdict. The worsening diabetes which cost him 20 kilos of body weight in February this year is now back under control, he asserts.
Sponichi is the only newspaper which ran these specific Teru quotes, and of course they also published the general information. He ties the Sponichi attribution to a random sentence instead of the whole thing (eg "Sponichi reports today the following:") to make it look like he's doing something.
If he made it clear to his audience when he was contributing nothing to the reports (thereby admitting he is not a 'sumo journalist'), I would have far less enmity towards him.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 10:55:30 UTC No. 195540
>>195538
>If he made it clear to his audience when he was contributing nothing to the reports (thereby admitting he is not a 'sumo journalist')
He only does it when he can whine about people criticizing him.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 12:24:56 UTC No. 195542
>>195025
comfymaxxed
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 17:09:09 UTC No. 195558
>>195538
>>195540
>Chris mindreads the wrestlers and makes some shit up
>Schizo Chris REEEEE
>Chris states when he's quoting a newspaper source, just not in the way I like it
>NO Chris you HAVE to make shit up all the time otherwise I can't call you a schizo REEEEE
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 18:26:15 UTC No. 195563
>>195558
What the fuck are you talking about? He would be doing a service if he were just translating articles for an English-speaking audience and nothing else, and identifying himself with such a role. Go into his comments if you think people aren't deceived.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 21:06:10 UTC No. 195575
>>195563
I agree with you on principle, but unless we're prepared to say he's an outright liar and fantasist, he does attend numerous events and has personal (albeit fairly casual) relationships with multiple active and former rikishi. He's not solely a translator and aggregator. Given that the commuity of sumo followers outside of Japan is so small, I think you're doing yourself a disservice if you completely write off a prominent and well-known source of sumo news.
Anonymous at Sat, 27 Apr 2024 21:38:28 UTC No. 195577
>>195563
His YouTube comments are the perfect example of why we didn't gatekeep sumo hard enough. Chris is the face of western sumo to those few coaches etc. who don't tell him to fuck off so it's no wonder we didn't get anything until SPT.
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 01:28:49 UTC No. 195609
>>195582
Is that a sausage swastika?
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 03:50:44 UTC No. 195621
>>195610
He was so big and tall, why didn't he just stand there?
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 04:24:50 UTC No. 195624
Kise beya has a public training session at a park and at the end of it they fought pretend matches again some of the little kids that attended. All of kids could figure it out except this one kid who didn't understand and just started playing in the sand.
https://youtu.be/tEn1GxJLEBw?t=1239
Wonder why that one kid couldn't figure out what was going on
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 04:58:38 UTC No. 195627
>>195624
>letting women on a dohyo
sumo has fallen
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 05:15:16 UTC No. 195629
I had a dream last night, or perhaps it was a nightmare, where I had gone to japan to become a sumo wrestler, but then I realised how that would impact my life and I tried to leave only to get trapped in an endless apartment complex, kinda killed my hype for the coming basho to be honest.
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 05:15:42 UTC No. 195630
>>195627
>women
Little girls are okay.
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 05:20:00 UTC No. 195631
>>195627
>>195630
Period blood is impure and that's what prevents women from stepping on the dohyo, technically speaking prepubescent and post menopausal women should be fair game.
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 09:09:28 UTC No. 195661
>>195658
The most powerful brand of sumo there is - to step in the dohyo and not even notice that your opponent is there.
🗑️ Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 22:38:40 UTC No. 195713
>>195658
Enwords not beating the low IQ allegations. I hate them so much.
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 22:40:13 UTC No. 195715
>>195632
I'd be 100% on board with onnazumo if they wore only a mawashi like the men. No shorts, no bodysuit, tits out and swingin'.
Anonymous at Sun, 28 Apr 2024 23:07:59 UTC No. 195719
>>195715
Japan should really just make Keijo into a real sport. It would single-handedly revive the Japanese economy.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 04:39:55 UTC No. 195744
>>195715
FUCKING THIS.
This is the problem with UFCW. No one wants to see boney ass lesbians tap each other in the face for 15 minutes. When I see a cat fight, I want to see some jiggle!
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 05:22:45 UTC No. 195747
>>195744
Even being 250 lbs won't give japanese women tits or ass
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 05:25:57 UTC No. 195749
>>195747
Lies.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 05:41:23 UTC No. 195751
Keisho not beating the lolicon allegations any time soon.
>>195747
Hitomi Tanaka did karate. Canan ASMR did kendo. Statistically speaking it's likely for there to be one girl with macromastia who did school sumo.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 09:17:04 UTC No. 195764
>>195747
Surgery and hormones will, especially if they start straight out of middle school like a lot of rikishi do.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 14:38:32 UTC No. 195779
Banzuke next week?
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 14:41:54 UTC No. 195780
>>195779
Should be this week, no?
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 15:36:24 UTC No. 195784
the banzuke has, sadly, lost its battle with cancer
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 15:56:04 UTC No. 195785
reminder this is Terunofuji's last basho.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 16:12:58 UTC No. 195789
>>195785
In July he's just going to send his son and hope nobody notices the difference.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 16:28:27 UTC No. 195790
>>195779
Banzuke in a couple hours.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 16:30:26 UTC No. 195791
>>195790
For me, the banzuke is not official until it is on SumoDb
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 17:03:32 UTC No. 195792
>>195789
>his son is Ochil
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:07:06 UTC No. 195796
I wonder how English NHK commentators will speak about the Miyagino scandal. They usually try to sweep scandals under the rug or try to euphemize them. For example, the Asanoyama scandal was never referred to anything but "violation of coronavirus protocols" by 3 of the 4 commentators. (The only one who hinted at the hostess bar thing was Murray.)
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:45:20 UTC No. 195802
>>195796
"Inappropriate roughhousing"
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:49:18 UTC No. 195803
>>195796
>Miyagino was incacable to carry out his oyakata duties so he and his wrestlers were transferred to isegahama stable
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 18:51:08 UTC No. 195805
>>195796
What Miyagino scandal? I don't see a Miyagino on the banzuke OR on the official list of stables.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 20:27:08 UTC No. 195823
>>195805
>OR on the official list of stables
https://sumo.or.jp/ResultRikishiDat
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 20:42:15 UTC No. 195827
>>195823
Nothing to see here, move along.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 21:05:48 UTC No. 195829
its up
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBa
Takerufuji got 6e
Takarafuji made it back to makuuchi
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 21:10:47 UTC No. 195831
Hakuoho is officially listed as from Isegahama beya
Its over for Miyagino
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 21:27:59 UTC No. 195836
>>195829
>Kotozakura
God, that looks strange on the actual banzuke after so many posts about it. Whose name change should we meme into existence now?
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 21:34:38 UTC No. 195837
>>195836
>meme into existence
Nigger he's been pretty open about wanting to make that change.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 21:35:43 UTC No. 195839
>>195837
I've never heard of a sumo wrestler that doesn't credit his success to the support of his fans.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 22:06:15 UTC No. 195844
>>195829
>Jk20
It's not owari da until it's owari da.
Anonymous at Mon, 29 Apr 2024 23:22:39 UTC No. 195857
My guy Higonoumi up to Makushita 53
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 01:52:56 UTC No. 195884
Onosato's ozeki campaign begins
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 02:18:02 UTC No. 195887
Roga lucked out.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 03:27:36 UTC No. 195891
did otani really intai
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 08:18:41 UTC No. 195911
>>195829
Can’t wait to watch takerufuji get shit on since he can’t farm low level comp first week.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 09:44:23 UTC No. 195913
>>195624
>first ever pro sumo graduate from prestigious Tokyo University
>reduced to fighting with simpletons in a sandpit
Truly a tragic career.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 10:22:03 UTC No. 195916
>>195829
>Onosato vs Terunofuji on day 1
Nice
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 10:27:25 UTC No. 195917
>>195916
>Teru's last match will be against the next Yokozuna.
Like pottery.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 10:53:14 UTC No. 195921
>>195911
He beat a komusubi, a sekiwake and an ozeki, all of whom went kachikoshi. I don't expect him to struggle any more than you might expect a rikishi to struggle in the basho after his hatsu yusho.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 11:37:36 UTC No. 195923
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 11:43:00 UTC No. 195924
>>195923
Ligma.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 13:05:59 UTC No. 195926
>>195839
Fans outside of natural born Japanese do not exist.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 15:04:44 UTC No. 195938
>>195911
It's pretty common that someone shits themself after winning the time before
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 15:18:37 UTC No. 195941
Takerufuji's ankles will probably explode this basho
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 15:22:26 UTC No. 195942
>>195938
Depends on what you consider shitting the bed. I just ran the numbers and first-timers in the 15 post-war era average 8.6 wins.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 16:34:55 UTC No. 195951
>>195921
This, plus he is still outside joi, so he will still be facing off against the weaker competition he was handling with ease. We already saw this recently with Atamifuji, if he is going to find a level that makes getting KK a challenge, its going to have to be in joi because the challenge of winning at M6 aren't all that much greater than at M17
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 16:37:06 UTC No. 195952
>>195941
Akebono had little sissy ankle and he did fine
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 16:38:30 UTC No. 195953
>>195948
Sumo, at least in America, still has some remnants of popularity from when the Hawaiians were involved. The boomers stopped watching because it stopped being on american television.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 18:04:42 UTC No. 195960
>>195951
>the challenge of winning at M6 aren't all that much greater than at M17
Weeell, I wouldn't go that far. Last basho, up to M13W, every wrestler had at least one juryo opponent. For a rising rikishi rather than someone moving down, that's basically a free win.
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 18:22:25 UTC No. 195964
>>195948
It isn't auto-translating based on region like youtube does?
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 19:18:01 UTC No. 195971
>>195948
The East... has fallen...
Anonymous at Tue, 30 Apr 2024 22:26:59 UTC No. 195998
>>195951
>We already saw this recently with Atamifuji
And more recently with Onosato
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 02:10:04 UTC No. 196019
Chris take the exact opposite approch to the Onosato issue that he does the Miyagino's misfortunes. In Hakuho's case Chris's reaction was "why are they doing this, this punishment is too severe" in Onosato's case its "His apology wasn't sincere enough, why doesn't JSA take more action against him?"
So it's pretty clear that Chris is just a racist who hates the Japanese, which means that he can't be having a very pleasant time living in Japan, head have a better attitude towards his hosts if was enjoying his time there.
And considering that Chris already wore out his welcome in England even after growing up in a very posh ruling class family, you have to presume that his misfortunes are of his own making.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 02:57:11 UTC No. 196023
get a trip
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 03:44:38 UTC No. 196032
>Endo at J3
He'll probably make it back.
Nice to see Chiyomaru make it back.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 04:19:35 UTC No. 196038
Guy turns 24 this year so he's probably nearing but yet to hit his prime. However he has never fought anyone higher than Ms6, so I wouldn't count on it at least for Natsu, maybe sometime this year or next year though.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 05:46:36 UTC No. 196046
>>196042
Impressive, very nice. Let's see his knees.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 07:30:31 UTC No. 196054
also, old thread has lasted even through banzuke day
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 13:16:03 UTC No. 196072
>looking at reddit
That's how we know you are reddit.
Also, hating abi has been here since 2018
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 14:12:37 UTC No. 196077
>>196072
The fuck for?
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 14:34:54 UTC No. 196080
>>196079
I see two wins on that flowchart and one loss. That's kachikoshi, my friend.
And he didn't ban himself. Blame that faggot Shibatayama. Abi stood up for what was right.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 15:35:19 UTC No. 196085
>>196079
>god awful style of sumo
If it gets you to the top division, it's an elite style of sumo. I can't hate a winner.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 15:36:25 UTC No. 196086
>>196079
We are all retard autists.
We are all Abi.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 16:31:21 UTC No. 196090
>>196080
>Abi stood up for what was right.
Sleeping through meetings?
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 16:34:34 UTC No. 196091
>>196090
All rikishi got banned from social media because one rikishi slept through a meeting? Doesn't add up.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 16:40:11 UTC No. 196093
>>196091
do you not get jokes or do you not know the context
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 16:42:08 UTC No. 196094
>>196093
I only know about his tied up photo thing and I think there were some COVID breaches or something?
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 20:01:17 UTC No. 196112
>>196102
>first letter omitted when called by gyoji's
>hoe time(moo)
asanoyama would love this guy
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 20:07:32 UTC No. 196114
>>196102
>name in kanji is "shota dream"
Keisho has competition.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 20:44:05 UTC No. 196120
>>196080
>did not ban himself
no shit retard. he was the main catalyst for the ban.
>>196085
he got there beacuse there are too many mamachari riders in sumo.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 22:03:33 UTC No. 196128
>trolled instagram so hard he got all 600 rikishis permab& from social media
If this doesn't inspire tremendous admiration from you then you are not 4chan material and reddit is where you belong.
Abi is an excellent wrestler, he has championships in every division save for jonokuchi as well as 2 JYs and he is on his way to making ozeki. Terao taught him well.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 23:24:48 UTC No. 196134
>>196055
Basing your opinion on what others think is the most reddit thing you could do. Not liking something because another group likes it (or vice versa) is reddit behavior.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 23:55:49 UTC No. 196136
>>196134
It has never been a bad thing to intentionally avoid things that your enemies, opponents, or rivals like. If the man doesn't like Reddit, it's natural that he wants to distance himself from Reddit's ways, because those things are tainted by association.
Anonymous at Wed, 1 May 2024 23:57:50 UTC No. 196137
>>196136
Counterpoint: in order to avoid what Reddit likes, you need to give a fuck about Reddit in the first place. I do not give a fuck about Reddit, therefore I do not give a fuck about what Reddit likes or dislikes.
If you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
Anonymous at Thu, 2 May 2024 01:46:49 UTC No. 196146
Anyone have the webm of Ishiura gigaslapping Akiseyama?
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 01:16:38 UTC No. 196260
>>196128
>on his way to making ozeki
this is never happening. Abi is too one-dimensional and inconsistent
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 04:25:20 UTC No. 196279
>>196260
Keisho is just as predictable and he is starting his 6th year as ozeki
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 09:28:45 UTC No. 196305
>>196279
Pretty sure all Abi haters are closet fags.
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 13:30:02 UTC No. 196314
New Prime TIme just dropped
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 18:59:49 UTC No. 196343
>>196335
two western rocks in the bath
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 20:50:52 UTC No. 196353
Chris says Asanoyama might not compete in Natsu basho
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKr
If he misses it then look for him to win Nagoya with the easy first week starting from a low rank
Anonymous at Fri, 3 May 2024 23:44:38 UTC No. 196369
>>196353
That's cool man but I don't really care, buy an ad
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 01:43:55 UTC No. 196383
>>196353
>Assman out
>Keisho probably out
>Teru not even training, will be out in the first week
>Kirbyama no longer a factor, this will be his last basho as ozeki
>Takerufuji still not practicing
The field is wide open, Abi probably has the inside lane to scoring his 2nd cup, Zak & Boozeboy will probably be competitive too.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 02:04:38 UTC No. 196386
>>196353
Kill yourself
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 03:30:31 UTC No. 196401
>>196383
>Teru not even training
Teru doesn't need to spar to stay competitive. Even during his second ozeki run, he was already mostly doing weightlifting and sparring very little. It's not like he has much to gain from sparring anyways. He's not going to get that much better skill-wise and he doesn't really need to because he's better technically than pretty much everyone currently competing. It's been his body that's failed him, so he might as well preserve what little health he has left.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 03:41:38 UTC No. 196402
>>196401
The thing to really watch on him is bodyweight. He should be around 170-180kg. His style doesn't work great light
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 03:52:29 UTC No. 196405
>>196402
His back and knees and diabeetus don't work when he's heavy.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 04:30:53 UTC No. 196413
>>196402
All styles work great light. Weight is a meme.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 07:25:55 UTC No. 196436
>>196319
Skinny legs, but great calves.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 09:16:39 UTC No. 196444
>>196413
>t. 55kg girly boy
Post asshole
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 13:54:55 UTC No. 196456
>>196413
why did enho and ishiura and wakatakakage and saltman and all who came before not bake ozeki?
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 14:24:17 UTC No. 196458
>>196456
Height is not a meme.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 14:29:15 UTC No. 196459
>>196458
height and weight go hand in hand
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 15:01:37 UTC No. 196465
>>196459
No they dont.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 15:13:20 UTC No. 196467
>>196465
If my leg is one inch longer than yours, I have an extra one-inch slice of muscle and fat and bone added to my weight.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 16:52:07 UTC No. 196468
>>196459
>do they correlate? Yes
>do they correlate so strongly that someone taller is necessarily heavier? No
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 16:56:27 UTC No. 196470
>>196467
>Takakeisho: 5' 9" 365 lbs
>Yao Ming: 7' 6" 310 lbs
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 16:56:44 UTC No. 196471
>>196468
no shit retard
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 17:02:57 UTC No. 196472
>>196470
Retard, its
>enho 5'6 209lbs
>hakuho 6'4 335lbs
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 17:13:35 UTC No. 196473
>>196471
the existence of >>196472
demonstrates there are people in this thread who need it spelled out for them
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 17:58:54 UTC No. 196481
>>196470
>Takakeisho: 4 Emperor's Cups
>Yao Ming: Jobs to sandanme
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 18:02:34 UTC No. 196482
>>196481
Meme cups.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 18:05:58 UTC No. 196483
Sumo is a meme.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 18:32:17 UTC No. 196484
Memes are sumo.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 19:02:23 UTC No. 196489
>>196383
>Kirbyama no longer a factor, this will be his last basho as ozeki
Is he going back to his old name?
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 19:07:07 UTC No. 196490
>>196489
he's making it up because Kiri is still injured.
Anonymous at Sat, 4 May 2024 23:36:02 UTC No. 196531
I like it when rikishi change their name but only a written change so that the name sounds exactly the same but is written with different kanji.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 01:52:35 UTC No. 196544
Sadly, former yokozuna Terukuni has also died.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 01:57:53 UTC No. 196545
>>196544
Yeah, 47 years ago.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 02:14:04 UTC No. 196549
>>196545
I'm sorry, does that make it less sad to you?
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 03:23:44 UTC No. 196551
>>196549
Shintos get reincarnated, he might've already died again by now
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 12:15:40 UTC No. 196584
>>196545
47. he was a fuckin kid
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 15:15:41 UTC No. 196595
>>196584
When will we see the new tsukedashi in Futagoyama-beyas channel?
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 15:18:44 UTC No. 196596
>>196595
They've got a TD coming in too? Didn't know that.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 16:38:46 UTC No. 196605
>>196328
Why does he look like he's rotting?
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 16:47:07 UTC No. 196607
>>196605
the insides of the flaps rub against each other and get irritated
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 18:17:22 UTC No. 196616
>>196605
You gotta get him in the fridge quick after he wins
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 19:00:35 UTC No. 196622
>>196621
He will be transformed into a god. You'll see.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 19:28:53 UTC No. 196624
>>196621
I hope he does well. If it was any other stable it wouldn't be an issue, but it'd be really depressing to see less and less of him in the videos until someone admitted he'd run away back home.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 20:46:13 UTC No. 196633
>>196621
174cm at 15 years old could easily end up near 190cm eventually. 190 seems to be about the perfect height for a sumotori
>>196597
>22, 173cm
Won't make it past makushita
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 20:49:57 UTC No. 196634
>>196621
>15 year old
He has plenty of time to grow
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 20:54:01 UTC No. 196635
173 cm is taller than Toyonoshima and Takekaze.
Anonymous at Sun, 5 May 2024 21:53:22 UTC No. 196645
>>196597
He looks tiny for 120kg, is that a typo or are his bones made of tungsten?
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 04:27:44 UTC No. 196660
>>196645
Probably another university muscle manlet along the lines of Asakoryu.
Asakoryu is listed at 178cm 119kg, might make top division someday soon, but he needs to add about 50kg if he wants to be competitive at the very top. All those guys like Ishihura & Kotoeko have the wrong idea, Keisho knows what it takes to compete as a short guy
Those arms in the pic in >>196597 look like they could split the seams in that jacket, dude needs a better tailor
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 12:23:52 UTC No. 196673
Newest Schriszoid video implies that theres sumo civil war going on behing the curtain where petty old men leak info about other stables just to get revenge
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 12:27:09 UTC No. 196674
https://x.com/BleacherReport/status
Which heya is this?
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 12:40:11 UTC No. 196676
>>196674
>Sokokurai
Arashio
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 12:46:05 UTC No. 196677
>>196676
Oh yeah. Didn't see him lurking there. Thank you.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 14:59:15 UTC No. 196690
>>196674
patethic, pushes off 17yo kid and acts like he won super bowl..
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 15:41:53 UTC No. 196694
>>196673
>petty old men leak info about other stables just to get revenge
This is literally what the tabloids have been doing for the past 70+ years, what the fuck has him convinced this is new
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 15:52:27 UTC No. 196695
>>196694
The fact he has an audience of fart huffers that he can leech off who think he's the only honest voice in an evil xenophobic Japanese sport.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 16:50:54 UTC No. 196701
Injured muscle manlet Kiho's shikona reverted to his Kawazoe, his given name. Does that mean he quit?
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 16:54:06 UTC No. 196702
>>196701
Or that he's going to take a -fuji name now that he's Isegahama.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 17:06:56 UTC No. 196703
>>196702
He tsukedashi'd at Ms15 and rose to Juryo as Kawazoe and then sank to Sd 48 as Kiho, maybe he decided Kiho was a bad luck name
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 17:07:05 UTC No. 196704
>>196701
He went back to Kawazoe because he fell out of the sekitori ranks and will change it back to Kiho when he gets back up. You see this on rare occasions, but it happens.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 18:24:34 UTC No. 196712
>>196674
>>196690
I love how the enword is at an advantage because he doesn't have a mawashi on that he can be thrown from or grabbed by and still boasts.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 18:35:39 UTC No. 196714
>>196712
do you not understand what butsukarigeiko is
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 18:45:12 UTC No. 196715
>>196714
That's how they start but it definitely doesn't look like what they're doing. You can even see Jun trying to grip a non-existent mawashi out of reflex once the black guy gets a grip on his own.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 19:09:25 UTC No. 196718
>>196715
if the pusher isn't driving forward in a straight line it's part of the lender's job to guide their elbows inward or to toss them to the side as a signal to restart. The pusher also isn't typically supposed to grab the mawashi of the lender
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 19:18:07 UTC No. 196720
>>196718
I know that, but I don't think the black guy knew that. He's clearly just trying to actually wrestle the guy.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 20:14:09 UTC No. 196728
>>196720
exactly. The rikishi was trying to keep things in line with a drill, while the black guy thought this was some kind of real match
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 20:25:34 UTC No. 196729
>>196728
or he's just celebrating being able to push a rikishi out of the ring
don't be a mindreader like chris
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 20:58:38 UTC No. 196734
>>196730
What?
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 21:08:27 UTC No. 196735
>>196734
that is the caption of the video in the Bleacher Report tweet in >>196674.
Anonymous at Mon, 6 May 2024 22:55:28 UTC No. 196743
>>196735
Oh. Sure, but it's not like Parsons said that.
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 00:20:17 UTC No. 196746
>>196745
You can see the fighting spirit in the eyes of Duckerufuji
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 00:38:24 UTC No. 196747
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 00:51:37 UTC No. 196748
Whats the possibility that Hakuho stages a coup and takes over Isegehama next year when the boss reaches retirement age?
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 00:54:52 UTC No. 196749
>>196748
Hakuho does not have enough allies to make such a thing happen
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 01:12:47 UTC No. 196753
>>196745
Goosenoyama.
>>196748
Zero.
Takanohana had half the JSA on his side and failed.
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 01:14:16 UTC No. 196754
What happened to Salt City Sumo?
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 01:24:23 UTC No. 196755
>>196754
Dehydration.
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 01:27:13 UTC No. 196756
>Abi-tross
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 06:29:59 UTC No. 196779
>>196749
presumably he would have to fight them for it, since he is only recently retired he could probably take them
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 10:14:32 UTC No. 196783
>>196768
Love this one.
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 17:31:27 UTC No. 196813
>>196766
Wow this is great
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 20:50:53 UTC No. 196846
>>196779
I'd pay to watch Hakuho fight a mob of geriatric 60 year olds, but I bet those same 60 year olds would not be thrilled to fight him
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 22:11:51 UTC No. 196855
When is NHK's Grand Sumo Preview show scheduled to start this basho?
Anonymous at Tue, 7 May 2024 22:26:17 UTC No. 196857
Chris says that Asanoyama isn't going to make the start of the basho due to knee problems.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mby
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 02:15:25 UTC No. 196871
>>196857
https://www.sankei.com/article/2024
Here's where he got that information. Hope this helps!
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 05:19:13 UTC No. 196889
>>196871
You got it backwards, that shimbun sources their info from Chris
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 10:39:33 UTC No. 196897
>>196894
Nice.
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 14:08:08 UTC No. 196903
>>196889
Nah. Asanoyama sources from Chris.
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 14:10:44 UTC No. 196904
Asanoyama IS Chris.
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 14:45:26 UTC No. 196907
Chis is the spirit of sumo underneath each rikishi's mawashi
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 14:55:07 UTC No. 196908
>The spirit of sumo is sweaty, tiny, hairless balls that spout tabloid gossip all day.
You learn something new every day.
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 19:27:49 UTC No. 196952
Who cares when we've got PRIME TIME
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DS
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 19:48:24 UTC No. 196953
>>196951
Nothing about cheis is fresh
see >>196908
thats not something you can fix with a washing amd some febreeze
Anonymous at Wed, 8 May 2024 23:29:20 UTC No. 196987
>>196976
something like half of active stables don't have any sekitori
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 07:49:37 UTC No. 197024
>>196976
>superior teppo and shiko training
operating the chopsticks is the most important aspect of sumo training, all that exercise is a big waste of time
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 08:41:34 UTC No. 197028
>Terunofuji out
>Asanoyama out
>Takerufuji out
Ozeki/Onosato yusho
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 09:43:34 UTC No. 197029
>>197028
He will be FILTERED by KotoZAKURA
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 11:44:30 UTC No. 197036
>>197028
It's Takerufujiover...
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 11:45:12 UTC No. 197037
>>197034
his tummy hurt, doesn't count
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 12:16:34 UTC No. 197039
>>197028
Jesus, how bad did he fuck up his ankle on Day 14 last basho?
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 12:19:40 UTC No. 197040
>>197028
I'm guessing the answer is no, but if Hoshoryu get's a strong win this time, is his 11-4 Jun-yusho enough to be "equivalent" for Yokozuna promotion?
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 12:21:13 UTC No. 197041
>>197040
>is his 11-4 Jun-yusho enough to be "equivalent" for Yokozuna promotion?
No. 11-4 has never been good enough and it certainly would not have been good enough in a tournament where the yokozuna and two of the other three ozeki were injured.
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 12:30:12 UTC No. 197044
>>197043
>Pre-Futahaguro
Standards were different back then. In the pre-modern era you'd have guys promoted to yokozuna from ozeki without winning any tournaments, let alone two in a row.
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 12:34:44 UTC No. 197046
>>197044
I know, just saying.
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 16:24:14 UTC No. 197057
>>196976
The absolute unit.
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 19:29:12 UTC No. 197074
>>197047
terrible form, if you have to flex your back like that you should reduce the weight you're using
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 20:07:28 UTC No. 197078
>>197077
>Reduce the (body, bar, food) weight
>Reduce extra tournaments to help recovery
>Reduce JSA influence
>Reduce the dohyo height
how bout they reduce their head to mush lmaoo
Anonymous at Thu, 9 May 2024 21:56:52 UTC No. 197094
>>197078
Sumo should:
>Institute a new minimum weight of 150kg for a rikishi - if you lose too much weight you're immediately dropped down to Jonokuchi for the next tournament
>Add a tournament in Hokkaido, an extra one in Tokyo, and once every three years, a tournament in a foreign country
>Introduce elder tournaments with a proper elder banzuke, to replace the ridiculous politicking they currently do
>Raise the dohyo, so wrestlers don't get complacent about falling off and try harder to stay in
>Use the intimidating bulk of the rikishi to bully the Japanese government into giving them more funding
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 04:29:04 UTC No. 197109
NHK World Japan's Sumo Preview in two minutes if anyone cares.
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 07:27:40 UTC No. 197119
>>197109
give us a briefing, did i miss anything important?
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 12:18:54 UTC No. 197132
>>197131
>Injured Teru vs Onosato day 1
Actual Intai NOW
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 12:56:03 UTC No. 197137
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 13:11:36 UTC No. 197141
>>197131
>kotozakura
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 16:59:15 UTC No. 197164
>>197119
Nah. Just an interview with Hiradoumi which was admittedly nice. They had an Akebono eulogy as well at the end, which was great >>197111
I'm not surprised that there was no mention of the Miyagino scandal.
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 20:58:21 UTC No. 197205
>>197164
What Miyagino scandal?
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 20:59:23 UTC No. 197206
>>197205
Miyagino? Never heard of it.
Anonymous at Fri, 10 May 2024 23:13:44 UTC No. 197223
takerufuji will show up in the 2nd week and get enough wins to remain in makuuchi
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 00:39:18 UTC No. 197233
>>197223
god i wish but it just doesn't seem to be in the cards
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 00:54:12 UTC No. 197237
>>197223
takerufuji will show up in the 2nd week just as terunofuji is retiring. isegehama tag team.
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 01:07:49 UTC No. 197240
>>197237
As the moon sets, the sun rises
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 11:04:40 UTC No. 197274
>>197223
Takerufuji will show up on day 10 and break his other ankle.
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 11:06:14 UTC No. 197275
Did the dohyo ceremony already happen? If not, anyone know where/when I can catch the livestream if there is one?
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 11:17:26 UTC No. 197276
>>197275
Derp. Never mind.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OeG
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 19:20:19 UTC No. 197319
great chris moment at the end of his new video explaining why he hasnt done any interviews with the patreon money for the last year
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 19:40:01 UTC No. 197320
>>197319
to save you a click, no one wants to talk to him
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 20:54:40 UTC No. 197325
>>197320
The JSA must have sent goons round to retired wrestlers to scare them out of talking to gaijin. Sad!
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 20:59:17 UTC No. 197326
>>197319
chris is a massive faggot simping for enho like that too
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 21:18:22 UTC No. 197327
>>197326
>"The JSA should bend the rules and give Enho elder stock even though there's 40 guys right now properly eligible who don't have it yet."
Anonymous at Sat, 11 May 2024 22:53:56 UTC No. 197340
/sp/ game thread up
>>>/sp/140782525
Anonymous at Sun, 12 May 2024 07:22:39 UTC No. 197369
>>196754
https://www.youtube.com/@SaltCitySu
Anonymous at Mon, 13 May 2024 23:22:51 UTC No. 197545
it seems midnightsumo got problems with twitch again just at the start of the tourney...
Anonymous at Mon, 13 May 2024 23:35:28 UTC No. 197547
>>197545
I just watch Natto's in the morning anyways. Live is too late for me.
Anonymous at Tue, 14 May 2024 09:47:37 UTC No. 197586
>>197578
Very nice
Anonymous at Tue, 14 May 2024 10:38:52 UTC No. 197590
>>197547
his reruns are prime time for me to enjoy the top divisions
Anonymous at Wed, 15 May 2024 02:14:54 UTC No. 197692
Anonymous at Thu, 16 May 2024 08:04:11 UTC No. 197868
>>197545
if only there were other services for streaming oh no
Anonymous at Mon, 20 May 2024 19:07:09 UTC No. 198358
thanks for the webm
Anonymous at Tue, 21 May 2024 10:54:22 UTC No. 198422
>>198393
Can you make webm. of Atamifuji vs Tobizaru bout?
Anonymous at Thu, 23 May 2024 10:21:32 UTC No. 198578
Reminder to do your keiko reps.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?li
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?li
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 03:36:02 UTC No. 198837
>>198758
I had to watch it 3 times, I guess I'll never be a gyoji.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 09:06:20 UTC No. 198862
Has anyone tried one zup ozeki sake? Was it good?
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 12:13:38 UTC No. 198875
Welcome back to /xs/, oldfriends.
Welcome to /xs/, newfriends.
What a tournament. It started out pretty clowny but got damn good by the end.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 12:20:01 UTC No. 198876
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEI
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 15:11:09 UTC No. 198881
Really hoping Onosato is the real deal bros, I know we've had tons of "next great hope"s flame out but I just want someone to take over as the next consistently strong top guy.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 15:21:06 UTC No. 198882
>>198881
yes, a young strong yokozuna is needed for a very long time.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 15:44:53 UTC No. 198884
>>198882
>>198881
Personally, I'd rather have that be Takerufuji. We've seen both of their styles, and I feel like Takerufuji will be more interesting to watch win. Optimally though, we'll have both as Yoks.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 15:57:25 UTC No. 198885
>>198881
>Really hoping Onosato is the real deal bros, I know we've had tons of "next great hope"s flame out but I just want someone to take over as the next consistently strong top guy.
He feels more like it than Takerufuji (who is already 25 and has had lower body injuries going all the way back to high school) and Hakuoho (who has his own injury history plus he's slightly undersized)
Onosato's got the monster size, he's durable, he's still got plenty of space to refine his technique. (He still doesn't do well on defense, for example.)
I hope all of them get to ozeki/yokozuna sooner or later because they could have some great rivalries.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 16:07:07 UTC No. 198889
>>198885
>Takerufuji (who is already 25)
Takeru turned 25 a month ago, and Onosato is turning 24 in a little under two weeks. About a 13 month age difference between them.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 16:33:16 UTC No. 198891
>>198889
A year is not nothing.
Onosato is just entering his prime and will already be a sekiwake next tournament. Takerufuji is a year into his prime and will lose some of it getting back to the top division and working his way back up.
Do I think Takerufuji will eventually get to ozeki? Of course, but by the time he gets there, Onosato will already be well-established at the rank.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 16:44:40 UTC No. 198892
anyone got a pic of the golden macaroon?
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 17:02:00 UTC No. 198895
>>198894
thank you
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 17:13:10 UTC No. 198898
>>198891
>Do I think Takerufuji will eventually get to ozeki? Of course, but by the time he gets there, Onosato will already be well-established at the rank.
comically bold speculation
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 17:14:56 UTC No. 198899
>>198898
NTA, but if you're talking about the future, it's understood to be speculation.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 17:39:43 UTC No. 198902
>>198899
I mean that his prediction is so specific as to imply that more than guesswork has gone into it.
To such thinking, I say: never forget the tragedy of Miyabiyama the Forsaken. Sumo is the absolute worst sport in which to think the phrase "Assuming no injuries, ..."
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 18:54:37 UTC No. 198907
>>198902
Good point, for all we know, Onosato could tear something in his back lifting a bale of rice some farming community has gifted him and he'll never fight again.
I'm not saying Onosato is going to be ozeki in November, but all the indicators point to him getting there sooner or later:
- Prototypical size
- No injury history to speak of
- Already demonstrated an ability to perform at high levels and under pressure
If we were taking hypothetical bets on who is most likely to reach ozeki out of Takerufuji, Hakuoho, or Onosato, who would you bet on?
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 18:56:15 UTC No. 198908
>>198907
I fear that Hakuoho might be finished with his injury history...
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:17:44 UTC No. 198909
A few off-basho questions:
1) Are all the ranks above maegashitters considered "top"? Or rather, is a komusubi yusho a disgrace or not?
2) Do the rikishi know they will be granted a prize (on condition that they win) before their bout?
3) How long until TerunoWHOji is made to retire?
Also, anyone cares enough to make a webm of Onosato hairdressing? Very interesting to see it and the feller performing it was pretty young too, thought only old geezers do it nowadays.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:25:13 UTC No. 198912
>>198909
>1) Are all the ranks above maegashitters considered "top"? Or rather, is a komusubi yusho a disgrace or not?
Yes. A yusho by a komusubi is not a clown basho
>2) Do the rikishi know they will be granted a prize (on condition that they win) before their bout?
Yes.
>3) How long until TerunoWHOji is made to retire?
It will probably be a while before the YDC says anything. They don't want to embarrass the yokozuna. Maybe they'll work the back-channels first, just having a quiet word with Isegahama. Teru wants his 10th and wants to have another yokozuna ready to carry the torch but it doesn't look like his body will allow it anymore.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:26:36 UTC No. 198913
>>198909
everything over rank and file is Sanyaku, so no komosubi yusho is a thing. Ozeki SHOULD be fighting for it and tio be fair both of them were in the running, but takashitsho and especially kirishitma were disgracefull. Terunofuji should have Intai'd a year ago but there was only takakeisho and he was a big question mark.
Yes, the rikishi know about the prizes they might have and the conditions if any. A special prize also comes with a cool 20K,
He should have already, Probably hoped that kotozakura or nephew would have shaped up and took the belt by now.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:30:07 UTC No. 198914
>>198909
>3) How long until TerunoWHOji is made to retire?
Guaranteed he retires once he's secured elder stock. That's the only reason for him to stay on.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:34:04 UTC No. 198915
>>198914
what do you need to secure elder stock if the Yoko rank alone isn't enough?
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:36:14 UTC No. 198916
>>198912
>They don't want to embarrass the yokozuna
He does of that enough himself, tho.
And to think I was shitting on Kakuryu back in the day...
>>198913
>there was only takakeisho
There does not have to be a yokozuna, tho.
>>198914
Don't know how that works, but if it gives us a tangible horizon of time for this, so be it.
Cheers lads.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:36:59 UTC No. 198918
>>198915
Needs someone willing to sell it and the OK from the other elders. Generally wrestler take over from their own oyakatas when they are ready to retire
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:38:21 UTC No. 198919
>>198916
You need 2 ozeki. For a short bit he was yokozuna ozeki until kirishima went up, unless i'm misremembering.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 19:46:35 UTC No. 198921
>>198875
That first day when everyone in sanyaku except Onosato lost was excellent foreshadowing
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 20:11:38 UTC No. 198928
>>198881
>I just want someone to take over as the next consistently strong top guy.
No that I disagree, but I also enjoy the unpredictability of the interregnum turmoil.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 20:33:28 UTC No. 198931
>>198928
I'm just tired of it since the unpredictability has been going on for years now, while Hakuho and Kakuryu were still around because of how injured they were. Teru was a brief respite but he's back to the same mostly injured routine that we've already had to deal with.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 20:53:49 UTC No. 198935
OK, so Atamifuji shedding tears after getting henka'd and losing a shot at a cup is one thing.
Shedding tears after finishing 7-8 from M1 is something else entirely. He can't be that upset about not becoming komusubi.
Is he just a big crybaby? Is this what happens when rikishi don't get appropriately hazed?
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 20:56:54 UTC No. 198936
>>198881
I’m not sold on onosato yet let’s see if he’s ozeki in November then we can talk about this new hope shit. Onosato is coming into a super weak top division guys like nephew and zak had to claw and fight to get here.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 22:10:27 UTC No. 198943
>>198862
Just buy some. Sake like that isn't expensive.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 22:14:14 UTC No. 198944
>>198895
>Compiling macaroons to cross reference against bikes and umbrellas
im onto anon
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 22:30:05 UTC No. 198946
>>198909
>>198912
>a komusubi yusho a disgrace or not?
no, its not a disgrace, but who wins it isn't the only factor of a clown basho. go look at the seething and calls for clown basho when takakeisho won under similar sanyaku conditions
>>198916
>on Kakuryu back in the day...
Kakuryu stuck around shitting the bed and sitting tournaments for 4 years and he didn't have the excuse of being held together by duck tape and the hopes of the jsa.
Anonymous at Sun, 26 May 2024 23:15:51 UTC No. 198952
>>198941
Get what? Kachi-koshi?
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 00:50:19 UTC No. 198958
>>198912
>Teru wants his 10th and wants to have another yokozuna ready to carry the torch but it doesn't look like his body will allow it anymore.
He could get one more if he sits out for another year instead of trying to compete back to back.
>>198946
>he didn't have the excuse of being held together by duck tape and the hopes of the jsa
Kakuryu was held back from retiring because he didn't have Japanese citizenship.
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 00:59:59 UTC No. 198960
My guess is Isegahama wants a hefty retirement payout before he gives up the stock. He has to give up the stable July 2025, but can stay on another 5 years after that, which means Teru can't simply retire under his own name until July 2025 if he wants the Isegahama name. Teru therefore needs to secure an alternative name or raise the funds to give his stablemaster a retirement cushion.
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 01:06:54 UTC No. 198962
>>198958
>Japanese citizenship
oh yeah, forgot about that bullshit
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 03:46:27 UTC No. 198976
>>198936
kotozakura was wrecking shit throughout the january tourney, and would have clinched it if hoshoyru hadn't defaulted a win to the big guy leading to that closely fought playoff
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 04:08:53 UTC No. 198978
>>198976
>implying Hoshoryu would've beat Teru if they did fight
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 04:12:48 UTC No. 198981
>>198978
https://sumodb.sumogames.de/Query_b
lol
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 04:35:04 UTC No. 198984
>>198981
Exactly why KotozACKura fans are cucks.
>Koto would've yusho'd if this other guy who has never beaten Terunofuji won
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 04:35:54 UTC No. 198986
>>198984
Hey fuck you. I AM a Kotozakura fan.
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 04:36:31 UTC No. 198987
>>198981
I was going to post a screenshot of that with my greentext post, but we hit image limit.
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 05:52:26 UTC No. 198993
The start of the new interbasho period and the unavailability of posting images makes now the perfect time to start a new /sumo/, so here it is:
>>198992
>>198992
>>198992
>>198992
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 06:45:15 UTC No. 199003
>>198943
Can't find it in binland
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 07:18:35 UTC No. 199006
>>198935
That was Onosato you moron
but I do understand they look similar in profile while crying
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 18:26:37 UTC No. 199072
>>198886
What does he have on his survey for favorite anime/manga? This is very important: I will continue to support him or pray for his downfall depending on his taste.
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 18:37:40 UTC No. 199073
>>199072
Precure/Blame!
Anonymous at Mon, 27 May 2024 18:38:37 UTC No. 199074
>>199073
>Precure
No fucking way Onosato is that based. If true then he's NY favorite rikishi of all time.
Anonymous at Wed, 29 May 2024 22:31:58 UTC No. 199283
>>199074
my*
Anonymous at Wed, 29 May 2024 23:52:09 UTC No. 199295
What's everyone's shikona? I'm Daisukikuni.
Anonymous at Thu, 30 May 2024 02:27:26 UTC No. 199312
>>199295
大木 - Daiki
Anonymous at Thu, 30 May 2024 03:15:29 UTC No. 199319
>>199295
Shougaiji (翔害児)
Anonymous at Wed, 5 Jun 2024 19:28:15 UTC No. 200192
春生誕 Haruseitan
Anonymous at Thu, 6 Jun 2024 00:03:06 UTC No. 200226
>>200192
Not Shuntanjou (春誕生)?
Anonymous at Thu, 6 Jun 2024 08:48:04 UTC No. 200273
>>200226
I don't get it.
Anonymous at Thu, 6 Jun 2024 19:30:13 UTC No. 200382
>>200273
What were you going for?
Anonymous at Thu, 6 Jun 2024 19:30:56 UTC No. 200383
>>200382
Hail, Satan!
https://translate.google.com/?sl=ja
Anonymous at Thu, 6 Jun 2024 22:42:21 UTC No. 200421
>>200383
Here's my own attempt at it.
弊入聖燀 (Heiiruseitan), the holy flame which devotes itself to evil
Anonymous at Fri, 7 Jun 2024 08:35:00 UTC No. 200496
>>200421
That's retarded. You're retarded.
Anonymous at Sat, 8 Jun 2024 04:56:28 UTC No. 200618
>>200496
you're the one who thinks "haru" is pronounced like "hail"
Anonymous at Sat, 8 Jun 2024 09:33:02 UTC No. 200634
>>200618
It's close enough, cunt.
Anonymous at Sat, 8 Jun 2024 12:57:26 UTC No. 200650
>>200634
No it isn't, because nobody knew what you meant
Anonymous at Sat, 8 Jun 2024 14:32:11 UTC No. 200658
>>200650
Says you.
Anonymous at Sat, 8 Jun 2024 16:38:07 UTC No. 200670
>>200650
I got it right away. The second part was clearly Satan. What else could it have been?
Anonymous at Sat, 8 Jun 2024 22:59:31 UTC No. 200693
>>200670
>What else could it have been?
An actual attempt at a shikona meaning "born in Spring", due to his awful choice of kanji
Anonymous at Sun, 9 Jun 2024 12:56:25 UTC No. 200725
>>200693
>Implying the JSA would allow devotion to evil
Anonymous at Sun, 9 Jun 2024 20:13:16 UTC No. 200758
>>200725
when was the NSK's opinion being considered
Anonymous at Wed, 12 Jun 2024 03:25:55 UTC No. 201006
>>200725
>Implying the JSA would allow devotion to evil
鬼の臍 常吉 - Oninoheso Tsunekichi (Demon's belly button)
鬼小島 弥太郎 - Onikojima Yatarou (Demon Kojima)
鬼面山 谷五郎 - Kimenzan Tanigorou (Face of a demon)
赤鬼 豊 - Akaoni Yutaka (Red demon)