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๐Ÿงต /sumo/ - Off-Basho General

Anonymous No. 186986

Altomafuji edition

>Schedule:
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnTicket/year_schedule/

>Banzuke:
http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspx

>All the sumo links and how to watch live:
https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d

>Previous thread:
>>181431

Anonymous No. 186988

Alright let's see your image that just COULDN'T wait

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Anonymous No. 186989

>>186988
*teleports behind you*

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Kotomitsuki vs Wa....webm

Anonymous No. 186990

Anonymous No. 186991

>>186989
Closest I've ever seen someone come to winning in that position, outside of the one time the CPU fell backwards onto me in that fucking PS2 game.

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Anonymous No. 186994

>>186988

Anonymous No. 187016

>>186986
How do I start doing sumo,
Power lift and dirty bulk?

๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 187022

i'm staying in the old thread, as should everyone else. OP is a massive faggot, even picked a gay OP pic which barely relates to sumo to demonstrate what an AIDS infested sack of human trash he is

Anonymous No. 187023

>>187016
Start by getting into American football as an offensive lineman, and cross-train either judo or sambo (or both).

Anonymous No. 187028

>>187022
You been going to therapy Frank?

Anonymous No. 187047

>>187022
This is an imageboard. A thread that's hit image limit should be abandoned.

Anonymous No. 187053

>>187016
You start doing sumo. Eat sumo food, train with sumo methods, find someone to have a sumo match against. If you train powerlifting, you will just become a better powerlifter.

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 187055

>>187052

Anonymous No. 187056

>>187055
What happened in '74?

Anonymous No. 187059

Marge, who's Frank?

Anonymous No. 187062

>>187056
I visited Japan.

Anonymous No. 187091

>>187056
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fire_Horse

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Anonymous No. 187094

Musclesisters...

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Anonymous No. 187095

Anonymous No. 187099

>>187053
>train with sumo methods
Is there a place to read more about this?
>>187023
>judo and football
There is a club nearby so I will look into that. As for football I have been doing rugby since I young, thats probably close enough.

Anonymous No. 187100

>>187056
1973 had a worldwide oil crisis that in turn led to higher demand for more efficient and environmentally friendly Japanese products. Coincidentally, the video game crash in the US led to higher demand for Japanese electronic products as well. Every company related to tech, automobiles, and related production went on hiring sprees, which in turn led to more women in the workforce as a necessity to take up less labour-intensive jobs. This left more women with less time to get married and have kids.
It's a similar explanation to the late 40s by the way. The devastation of the war, massive amounts of men dying in the military, and need for rebuilding led to massive amounts of women having to work, especially widows having to look after their children.

Anonymous No. 187104

>>187055
Yeah I'm sure equal rights for women is the big event in the 1940s that impacted Japanese fertility rates. That just makes sense, not like anything else major was going on around that time.

Anonymous No. 187108

>>187099
Sumo Prime Time has a short series going through the basic training methods, and the information is available in all sorts of sumo-related places. Really, most of it is quite simplistic exercises, but done at a high bodyweight for hours and hours every day, followed by a big meal and a nap.

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Anonymous No. 187113

>me when op makes an early thread

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Anonymous No. 187115

Fill her up

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Anonymous No. 187116

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Anonymous No. 187117

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Anonymous No. 187119

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Anonymous No. 187122

>

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Anonymous No. 187123

Whats he into?

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Anonymous No. 187124

>>187123

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Anonymous No. 187126

>takakeisho is a lolicon
>hoshoryu is into muscle girls

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Anonymous No. 187128

>Did Iaaaahh do thaaaaaaat?

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Anonymous No. 187129

he really liked the special volume

Anonymous No. 187130

sir PLEASE, we have an IMAGE LIMIT to consider.

Anonymous No. 187131

>>187126
Based

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Anonymous No. 187132

>>187130
Sorry, gotta fill 'er up

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Anonymous No. 187134

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Anonymous No. 187135

79 more

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Anonymous No. 187137

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Anonymous No. 187139

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Anonymous No. 187141

>>187132
Have my latest power ranking chart.

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Anonymous No. 187152

>>186988
>being this salty over a new thread
What a fucking bitch. Fuck off to >>>/reddit/ with your salty punk ass.

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Anonymous No. 187159

miss me hakuho rice

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Anonymous No. 187175

>>186988
Fair point. they hate you for the truth

Anonymous No. 187178

>>187141
what's the consensus of adding the Hawaii bloatlords on there?

Anonymous No. 187181

>>187175
Seems like shodai has finally reached a point where he struggles sometimes and even when he tries, wonder if he's gonna come back harder or slip further. he's still in pretty good shape, his win over teru more than proves that.

Anonymous No. 187190

>>187178
I think the intent was to mainly focus on the current generation with a few old legends for comparisons sake, we kind of went overboard on the former yokos though.

Anonymous No. 187212

>>187190
>we kind of went overboard
Nonsense. Now add Daidouzan and Tsuneyo

Anonymous No. 187218

Who won the 48th Fuji Television Grand Sumo Tournament?Was it televised?

Anonymous No. 187228

>>187218
hoshoryu won it with a bunch of henkas

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Anonymous No. 187269

from the archives

Anonymous No. 187270

>>187269
Maybe he is shy

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Anonymous No. 187275

>>187269
>>187270

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Anonymous No. 187297

Anonymous No. 187299

>>187275
must be hard to be in that company and know your the 2nd worst ever to wear the rope

Anonymous No. 187301

>>187299
Honestly, just making yokozuna in the first place with three others on the banzuke is enough of an accomplishment. Kisenosato is tied for 9th all time in wins against yokozuna.

Anonymous No. 187305

>>187299
>the 2nd worst ever to wear the rope
not by miles: Maedayama, Musashiyama, Nishinoumi II, Hachijin II, Ooikari etc

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Anonymous No. 187309

>Bow down before me

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Anonymous No. 187311

>>187309

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Anonymous No. 187312

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Anonymous No. 187313

I found this picture just searching around for sumo images, and I'm pretty certain the text on the shirt is exactly quoting Hiro Morita. I don't know why someone would do that.

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Anonymous No. 187315

>>187313
Speaking of shirts, i have this one i got in japan that i like a lot, but it doesn't fit right now.

Anonymous No. 187398

>>187313
letting anyone make shirts was a mistake

Anonymous No. 187399

>>187315
could probably make 4th div with that build

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Anonymous No. 187439

้€ฒใ‚ ่ฒซใ‘ ็ฑณ่‹ฑใซๆœ€ๅพŒใฎใจใฉใ‚ๅˆบใ™ๆ—ฅใพใง

Anonymous No. 187450

>>187399
He's bigger than you think. Mk15

Anonymous No. 187451

>>187450
Impossible to say how far he'd climb, because the picture doesn't show His Brand of Sumo.

Anonymous No. 187456

>>187451
Every win by tsuridashi (lift out)

Anonymous No. 187458

>>187456
Enjoy no-knees

Anonymous No. 187552

>>187458
lifting out isn't how you destroy knees. i don't know how you unathletic dyel retards came to that conclusion. its planting awkwardly or getting hit from the sides that destroys knees. if carrying out killed your knees, no strongman would compete past 30.

Anonymous No. 187562

>>187552
>i don't know how you unathletic dyel retards came to that conclusion
Tochinoshin, Terunofuji, Baruto, Akebono

Anonymous No. 187577

Did anyone else feel like teru made kotonowaka look small? Teru is built different

Anonymous No. 187595

>>187577
I don't know how he does it. If I didn't know his statistics, you could tell me that he's 7 feet tall and 600 pounds and I'd probably believe you.

Anonymous No. 187603

>>187595
He's a very tall 6'4
Dunno how it works.

Maybe it's unironically >presence

Anonymous No. 187605

>>187577
teru is built like a powershitter, koto is built like the michelin man

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Anonymous No. 187662

Kak's new stable has a portrait of the great Mongol khan hanging over the Agari-zashiki.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9BMc59_ODU

Anonymous No. 187664

>>187662
My dad works for Nintendo and he said that if you don't put the Khan's picture up the Mongolian Secret Service comes and puts one up for you.

Anonymous No. 187673

>>187662
Wonder how many centuries have to pass before it becomes acceptable for Germans to hang a picture of Hitler in their office.

Anonymous No. 187677

>>187673
It will be a while. Genghis Khan didnโ€™t lose the only war he started and then killed himself.

Anonymous No. 187699

Nihon Sumoushi guy, are you around? What was the name of that book store you mentioned before? I might be visiting Japan in May.

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Anonymous No. 187700

>>187699
Biblio, but it's in a whole "book town" area. There are a ton of shops with seemingly everything, if you can't find what you want at one.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimbลchล_Book_Town
https://jimbou.info/bookstores/ab0187/

Anonymous No. 187702

>>187700
Perfect, thank you.

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Anonymous No. 187727

Anonymous No. 187741

Confirmation of the rumors about turmoil in the house of Miyagino
https://www.sponichi.co.jp/sports/news/2024/02/21/kiji/20240221s00005000431000c.html
Time for all of the Chris doubters to apologize

Anonymous No. 187749

>>187741
Translation?

Anonymous No. 187752

>>187741
Imagine doubting Chris-sama for even a moment. His access to the sumo world is unparalleled and his journalistic integrity is second to none. He's incredibly handsome and cool, and the Emperor should offer him the hand of the Princess and Japan's highest order of merit.

Anonymous No. 187758

>>187749
Makuuchi player Kita Seiho assaulted multiple brothers and disciples ``I am sincerely remorseful'' Disciplinary action, including Master Miyagino, was decided at an extraordinary board meeting on the 23rd

Anonymous No. 187760

>>187749
Board meeting on the 23rd about the situation in miyagino stable. Expected that Hakuho is going to get demoted (but still keep elder stock), hokuseiho is going to be asked to retire because apparently it was that bad. Of course, they could reject the resignation like with Abi/Asanoyama

Anonymous No. 187761

>>187760
Nice. I hope Hokuseiho retired in time for a Juryo guy to take his spot so Takarafuji can keep his Makuuchi slot. Good riddance to Hokuseiho.

Anonymous No. 187765

>>187760
>hokuseiho is going to be asked to retire because apparently it was that bad
JFC

Anonymous No. 187766

How did he bully them? Stand?

Anonymous No. 187767

>>187761
That's not how it works. The banzuke for March was already written one week after the January basho, it's just not announced yet.

Anonymous No. 187768

>>187767
They should simply reconvene and draw up a new Banzuke really quick. The handwriting looks pretty sloppy anyway, so I imagine it shouldn't take long to redo it.

Anonymous No. 187770

>>187766
He was stealing peoples wallets behind their backs, apparently

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Anonymous No. 187771

>>187766
From the Nikkan article.

Anonymous No. 187776

>>187760
I HATE HOKUSEIHO
I HATE HOKUSEIHO
I HATE HOKUSEIHO
I HATE HOKUSEIHO
I HATE HOKUSEIHO
I HATE HOKUSEIHO

Anonymous No. 187778

>>187776
*leans towards you* buddy, I'd be careful with that kind of talk

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Anonymous No. 187779

>>187778

Anonymous No. 187787

>>187771
>stealing from other rikishi's wallets
Is that what he's trying to do with his signature one-arm grip?

Anonymous No. 187792

>>187760
>Hokuseiho forced to retire
Man that sucks. I lived for that guy causing massive fucking seethe.
I also at this point question the act of kicking out young people in a sport struggling to attract any new stars that are even 1/100th the wrestlers of 15 years ago. I'd honestly let it slide since at this rate of "lol who cares about health" Sumo will be dead by 2075.
I do think they are more heavily targeting him because they hate Hakuho.

Anonymous No. 187794

>>187792
Sounds like they're targeting him because he's a big lazy piece of shit who's also been stealing from people forced to live communally with him. They've done plenty of stuff that's obviously just them being bitter about Hakuho, but this doesn't seem like that at all.

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Anonymous No. 187801

>While full detail of this violence has not yet come to light, a person familiar with the situation said that he "had heard it involved hitting and burning other rikishi".

Anonymous No. 187805

>>187779
Akafuji is special

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Anonymous No. 187808

Anonymous No. 187811

>>187760
>Hokuseiho might actually get removed
crazy

Anonymous No. 187818

>>187801
isn't that the Isegahama story that got Isegahama demoted?

Anonymous No. 187819

>>187760
Damn, I was almost starting to love hating him now that he wasn't cruising up the ranks for free. Farewell Stand, may sitting treat you kindly

Anonymous No. 187820

APOLOGIZE right the FUCK now to Chris Sumo

Anonymous No. 187821

>>187819
He isn't for sure out. There's a decent chance they reject his intai papers as they did with Abi, Asanoyama, etc. Also, remember this is the same Association that let Kasugano stay on after the golf club incident with just a slap on the wrist. I think it's down to how bad Hokuseihou comes across in a detailed telling of the events. A long suspension instead of intai isn't unrealistic imo

Anonymous No. 187822

>>187818
That's similar, but it's not the same story.
https://news.yahoo.co.jp/articles/1c7d767e0db76cc6ad8848b4f4b1c93aafa86663

Anonymous No. 187823

>>187820
For what? He just reads tabloid articles.

Anonymous No. 187826

>>187792
probably sooner than that, I'd bet they go bankrupt and forced to sell the rokugekan by 2035, with the association becoming defunct by 2055

Anonymous No. 187827

A 16 month suspension for the lad it would be a great loss for the sport if such a young talent left. A run from the very bottom should sort him out!

Anonymous No. 187829

>>187779
BYE BYE

Anonymous No. 187830

>>187823
Chris had this story ages before any of the Japanese papers did, he is exceptionally well connected within the sumo world

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Anonymous No. 187831

>>187830
I know you're joking but just for reference

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYtEPnNq5RA
Chris brings up the rumours for the first time, published 2/9

https://www.dailyshincho.jp/article/2024/01311058/?all=1
https://www.news-postseven.com/archives/20240207_1939560.html?DETAIL
tabloid articles he's referencing, published 1/31 and 2/7

Anonymous No. 187833

>>187830
>>187820
>>187741
>>187752
All hail Chrish Chan Sumochu, first of his name!

Anonymous No. 187834

>>187830
I'm not gonna subscribe no matter how much e-begging you do, Chris

Anonymous No. 187836

Its up
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkSQh6oJWlA

Anonymous No. 187837

>>187836
watch him backpedal when they spare him and say
>surely there must have been some desperate, last-second backroom maneuvering by hakuho for this to be possible

Anonymous No. 187838

>>187836
According to Chris-sensei, who is as well informed as a JSA executive board member (even better in some cases), its over for Hokuseiho and Miyagino Oyakata is going to be saged hard, lowered by two ranks, he is pretty much going to be cleaning toilets at the Kokugikan for a few years if he doesn't want to resign from the JSA

Anonymous No. 187839

>>187837
nice cope, but when has chris ever had to backpedal? pretty much never. i look forward to your apology after events play out exactly as chris said they would.

Anonymous No. 187841

Hokuseiho's dismissal opens up a slot in the top division ranks, seems like Takerufuji is likely to be the one to fill the slot, but there are a couple other possible candidates, but whoever goes, it means Onokatsu would get an early jump to Juryo.

Anonymous No. 187842

>>187841
PLEASE LET TAKARAFUJI STAY IN MAKUUCHI

Anonymous No. 187844

I remember how I once posted about being worried about Hakuho's future as an Oyakata back when he was just starting (which didn't seem to go off a good start). I always thought it was destined to be a rough one (I didn't want to call it a failure). Looks like it's becoming true so far.

Anonymous No. 187846

>>187844
>(which didn't seem to go off a good start)
Elaborate please.

Anonymous No. 187847

>Hokuseiho removed
Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy :-)

Anonymous No. 187848

>>187846
3 of Miyagino's top 4 have sustained injuries that required sitting out multiple bashoes and were tremendous setbacks to their careers and now the other one is about to be bounced as a result of Hakuho's failure to maintain discipline in his own stable.

Anonymous No. 187855

Hokuseiho and hakuho reinforcing the stereotype that non Japanese are uncultured swine

Anonymous No. 187856

Foreigners should all be banned from now on. The Mongolian menace has done enough damage. Wh*toids should not even be allowed to attend anything Sumo related from now on. And most of all, EVERY form of social media must be banned from being used by anyone related in any way to the sport. We must retvrn to tradition.

Anonymous No. 187858

>>187855
Yeah, reminds me of the Ukrainian Miss Japan.

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Anonymous No. 187861

>>187858
how the fuck is this ugly-ass miss japan, LMAO.

Anonymous No. 187862

>>187856
Gaijin should be collected into their own sumo league and made to fight on a dohyo that's thirty feet high. Enough is enough.

Anonymous No. 187871

hope this results in crashing the JSA with no survivors

ozumo bought out by TKO by end of decade

Anonymous No. 187872

>>187830
Quit shitting up our thread with your stupid /reddit/-tier trash.

Anonymous No. 187874

>>187871
Yeah fuck these racist Japanese, their xenophobia will only result in their "culture" to die LOL

Anonymous No. 187875

>>187861
Every white girl that goes to Japan looks like this I swear

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Anonymous No. 187890

>>187856
>retvrn to tradition
rikishi must meet a mandatory smoking quota

Anonymous No. 187899

Will this save Takarafuji?

Anonymous No. 187900

>>187899
No, there will just be one less guy in the top division in March.

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Anonymous No. 187904

>>187662
>konichiwa former yokozuna Kakuryu
>konichiwa fellow former yokozuna Hakuho
>what are you going to name your new sumo recruits?
>Kakuryu:

Anonymous No. 187905

>>187856
Banning foreigners honestly makes the sport non-competitive to me and a joke. If you have to ban and fix shit so your country wins, you aren't a sport anymore. I'd immediately cease watching sumo and would mock it constantly and would absolutely start regarding rikishi negatively and calling them fat fucks who can't fight.

Anonymous No. 187906

>Hokuseiho gone
There goes one of my favorite things about each basho.
I am going to fucking miss laughing at people raging when he won.

Anonymous No. 187913

Breaking.
https://www.sponichi.co.jp/sports/news/2024/02/23/kiji/20240223s00005000204000c.html

It's over. They have accepted Hokuseihou's intai papers.

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Anonymous No. 187914

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Anonymous No. 187915

>>187913
Can't wait to see him get heemed by some random heavyweight can in Rizin.

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Anonymous No. 187917

>>187915
He's young enough and uninjured enough that he might do perfectly well for himself in MMA. Then again, he's also physically retarded. So puroresu is likely to be his best bet. The new Rikidouzan, they'll call him!

Anonymous No. 187918

TIMBER

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Anonymous No. 187919

>>187913
>They have accepted Hokuseihou's intai papers.
LOL! Those niggers weren't fucking around. I wonder what would have happened it it was Nishinoseki instead of Miyagino.

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Anonymous No. 187920

>hokuseiho retired, records of bullying and thievery
>normies: but poor hakuho :((

Anonymous No. 187921

They updated the article to add
>็›ธๆ’ฒๅ”ไผšใซใ‚ˆใ‚‹ใจใ€ไปŠๅ›žใฎๆšดๅŠ›่กŒ็‚บใฎ็™บ่ฆšใฏไปŠๅนด1ๆœˆ21ๆ—ฅใ€็›ธๆ’ฒๅ”ไผšใฎๅ…ฌๅผX(ๆ—งใƒ„ใ‚คใƒƒใ‚ฟใƒผ)ใซๅŒ—้’้ตฌใŒๅŒ้ƒจๅฑ‹ๆ‰€ๅฑžๅŠ›ๅฃซใซๆšดๅŠ›ใ‚’็นฐใ‚Š่ฟ”ใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใจใฎๆŠ•็จฟใŒๅฏ„ใ›ใ‚‰ใ‚ŒใŸใŸใ‚ใ€็›ธๆ’ฒๅ”ไผšใŒๅฎฎๅŸŽ้‡Ž้ƒจๅฑ‹ใซ่ชฟๆŸปใ‚’่ฆ่ซ‹ใ€‚
According to the Japan Sumo Association, the violence was discovered after an investigation in response to someone tweeting at the official JSA twitter account saying that Hokuseihou was abusing his fellow rikishi.

Anonymous No. 187922

Who knew standing was a good bullying technique.

Anonymous No. 187923

>>187919
The bullying involved using an aerosol can as a flamethrower to burn someone. I think we see the same result with any heya.

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Anonymous No. 187925

>>187920

Anonymous No. 187926

>>187923
Maybe he was playing too much Metal Gear 2

Anonymous No. 187927

Mixed feelings. Don't like to see such a young guy fuck up like that, but if you're lighting motherfuckers on fire? Yea, fuck you. Glad to see we won't see that stupid "style" of sumo in the g'damn ring anymore though.

Fat standers pwned!

Anonymous No. 187928

>>187923
>using an aerosol can as a flamethrower
What do you call this kimarite?

Anonymous No. 187929

>>187928
ๅ›บไฝ“่›‡ใฎ่ก“

Anonymous No. 187930

>Good sports bullying: realistic criticism, drive to improve, fosters competition
>Japanese bullying: wipe my ass, get beaten with a golf club, get burned, get smacked in the head, get money stolen
Wtf is wrong with slopes?

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Anonymous No. 187931

>>187921
This is probably the anonymous twitter account that got the JSA's attention re: Hokuseiho's abuse/theft: https://twitter.com/sumodaikisu/

The article says the JSA became aware of the abuse due to a tweet they received on January 21. Whoever owns that account was spamming the same message to the JSA, to news outlets that cover sumo, to big sumo accounts, etc. during that time. If this person actually has insider knowledge and is telling the truth, it sounds there may be video evidence of the abuse and possibly even attempts to bribe a victim's (or possibly multiple victims') parents to keep them quiet? I don't know, I don't speak moon runes, and machine translations can be sketchy when it comes to details.

Pic related, with DeepL and Google Translate translations.

Anonymous No. 187932

>>187928
yakidashi (็„ผใๅ‡บใ—)

Anonymous No. 187934

>>187931
Shot in the dark, but Naoki Hanashi was a lower division wrestler as Mihonoumi wrestling for Musashigawa stable, retired January last year, and the September 10, 2022 join date was a day before what would be his last basho before injury and retirement. Maybe he heard stuff from guys he still knew.

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Anonymous No. 187937

They updated the article again. Says they plan to explore the option of putting Miyaginobeya under a different oyakata from the ichimon.

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Anonymous No. 187940

>>187937

Anonymous No. 187941

https://www.nikkansports.com/battle/sumo/news/202402230000317.html1

>Miyagino was aware of Kitaseiho's assault on B during the July 2022 tournament, but did not directly confirm the situation with B or Kitaseiho, nor did he even check B's photographs of the damage. He also did not warn Kita Seiho, and did not even report directly to the previous master. If Miyagino had taken this opportunity to directly confirm the situation with B and Hokushiho and to warn Hokushiho, the assault not only on B but also on A could have been identified earlier, and Hokushiho's assault could have been prevented from becoming a regular occurrence. As a result of failing to supervise Hokuseiho and report the incident to the association, the two victims were subjected to violence for more than a year, and Miyagino bears a heavy responsibility for this.

Anonymous No. 187942

>>187941
* https://www.nikkansports.com/battle/sumo/news/202402230000317.html

Anonymous No. 187943

What are the chances this is way more systemic than the JSA has let on and punishment is justified but people will still just scream muh GOAT and muh racism

Anonymous No. 187944

>>187920
I will quit watching sumo entirely if they fuck too much with Hakuho.

Anonymous No. 187945

>>187943
As a general rule, anything the JSA officially punishes is always more systemic than they let on. It has to be pretty big for them to act.
It's like how the Japanese legal system has a 99% conviction rate, but only because the preferred actions are "ignore so it doesn't hurt our crime stats"->"yell at someone to stop and hope they do"->"try and mediate between suspect and victim so the victim doesn't press charges"->"only press charges if there's a 100% chance of conviction"->"still try to mediate to cause a settlement/plea deal because judges don't like having to work" before they actually bother going to trial. Similar course of actions with the JSA internally.

Anonymous No. 187946

>>187943
There's probably some more bits we don't know but I don't think there really needs to be any more to it than what has already come out for the punishment to be justified. Demotion seems to always the response when there is a bullying scandal and the oyakata is deemed to have done nothing or not enough to stop it.

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Anonymous No. 187947

>>187944
t.

Anonymous No. 187948

>>187947
Don't care, won't watch. Might as well just watch UFC with actual fighters.

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Anonymous No. 187949

>>187940

Anonymous No. 187950

>>187949
Needs Hokuseihos attendant on fire in the background

Anonymous No. 187951

>>187945
>99% conviction rate
Most countries have this, the stat is just a Japan exceptionalism meme.

Anonymous No. 187952

Hakuho should get his elder stock taken away and the trash can Miyagino-beya should be closed down and all the wrestlers get intai'd

Anonymous No. 187953

>>187952
Take me out to the ball game. Take me out to Japan's new national sport. Buy me some peanuts and craaacker jacks
I don't care if sumo ever comes back cause it's root root root for the home team

Anonymous No. 187954

>>187952
I dunno know about screwing over the others but there's a reasonably high chance some like ochiai could just go to a shithole stable and do just as well if it closed

Anonymous No. 187955

>>187954
Don't care
Scouted by Hakuho = dismissal

Anonymous No. 187962

Did Enho get abused? Is that why he's perpetually injured?

Anonymous No. 187967

>>187944
I can do you one better

gonna go buy the cheapest day 7/8 tickets for may, then fuck up their Plumbing. enjoy week 2 with overflowing toliets

Anonymous No. 187969

This kind of behavior only happens because no sense of mortal peril looms over each rikishi in each heya and bands them together as brothers of war

Raise
the
fucking
dohyo

Anonymous No. 187970

Chris was way out in front of everyone else with this one, all the Chris naysayers came out looking like total chumps.

Anonymous No. 187971

>>187967
Probably death penalty in that backwards ass country desu

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Anonymous No. 187976

>>187970
Chris is close personal friends with what seems like most of the JSA's biggest names. You'd have to be retarded to question Chris's wisdom when it comes to behind the scenes goings on in the sumo world

Anonymous No. 187978

Chris Gould just sent me a personal message thanking me for always having his back, through the thick and the thin. No, Chris...thank YOU!!!!

Anonymous No. 187979

>>187913
Well, maybe if he learn to use both arms at the same time he could have a future in pro wrestling

Anonymous No. 187980

Maybe the stupidest wrinkle I've heard: Nikkan reports that one of the bullying methods was filling people's wallets with instant glue so they couldn't open them.

Anonymous No. 187981

>>187980
horrifying...lock this sick fuck up

Anonymous No. 187984

>>187980
Thats clever. They cant check if their money is stolen if they can't open the wallet. Hokuseiho is genius.

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 187985

New Tony Heller vid
https://youtu.be/ZlZREVT4Y5Q

Anonymous No. 187987

>>187834
I *did* subscribe to his patreon and he kicked me off for pointing out a mistake in a video

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Anonymous No. 187988

>Hokuseiho intai
Fuck Hokuseiho and all his fans who trumpeted that he will be next yokozuna. AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

Anonymous No. 187989

remember when taihou and kitanofuji brought guns to show and tell

Anonymous No. 187992

>>187988
Does this really look like the face of a bully?

Anonymous No. 188004

>>187980
Kek, if that is true, he at least knows how to pull a fun prank.

Anonymous No. 188007

>>187992
>>187946

Hokuseiho's acts of violence included beating people with a stick and scorching them with a spray can "flame thrower" - and additional things (not listed).

Anonymous No. 188013

>>187980
the smallest bill in Japan is essentially a $10, and so many things use coins. imagine $25 in coins all glued together. huge pain

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Anonymous No. 188018

>>187989
Yes

Anonymous No. 188019

>>188013
not to mention the value of the now ruined wallet.

Anonymous No. 188031

>>188019
Do none of you have acetone? Superglue dissolves almost instantly with a bit of acetone.

Anonymous No. 188034

Does anyone here have experience buying sumo tickets? I'm wanting to go see the May basho while I'm there, but I'm wondering what the best way to get multiple seats all together would be. Does it let you pick the exact seat you want when you buy from the official site?

On BuySumoTickets it mentions that when they get tickets for you they always keep the seats together, so I'm wondering if it might be easier to just do that and have my friends paypal me or something.

Anonymous No. 188036

>>188034
I bought mine from buysumotickets. They'll send it in an envelope to your hotel that your staying at. Just notify your hotel and reception will keep it and give it to you when you first check in, probably.

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Anonymous No. 188039

its over

Anonymous No. 188041

>>188039
What's next for Hokuseiho, lads? Place your bets.
>puroresu
>MMA
>acting
>restaurant
>nomadic farmer
>yakuza

Anonymous No. 188043

>>187904
>when the fusion dance backfires

Anonymous No. 188044

new Chris video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYogdXC5SMU

Anonymous No. 188045

>>188041
Scarecrow

Anonymous No. 188046

Why are people here so cynical? I feel like we all know how culturally backwards sumo can be, but why do people talk like they want the sport to fail and cease to exist?

>>187984
lol

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Anonymous No. 188057

16 Days till Osaka basho

>>188046
I'm sure a couple posters are genuinely mad, but I'd wager it's mostly shitposting to see who can type the most radical shit. Don't worry about it.

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Anonymous No. 188060

>>188031
>be you
>sumo kiddo
>hokSTANDho hates you
>finally get some free time to yourself
>no Bully now
>go to ueno zoo
>free admission cause sumo yamamoto damashiiii
>walk around 5 minutes
>get thirsty cause 200kg
>go to vending machines that are everywhere
>open wallet
>NANI!!??!!
>BAKANANA how didn't I notice!!!
>the old sticky wallet-o
>filled with hokuseeetho
>if only I had my utility mawashi with my fatcetone
its not likely they just have it lying around the stable either

Anonymous No. 188061

>>188034
buy directly from the venue when on sale
buysumo tickets like mentioned
buy from one of the tour sites if sold out everywhere
go wait at like 7am and hope to get standing room seats

Anonymous No. 188062

>>188034
Buying from the official NSK website is pretty easy.

>buy online
>go to any 7/11 in Japan
>awkwardly stammer out "ozumo ticketu"
>show the cashier the receipts with the deets
>they print out the tickets for you
As shrimple as that.

Anonymous No. 188065

>>188060
Of course they have acetone lying around, how else are they supposed to remove their nail polish before a tournament?

Anonymous No. 188066

>>188065
They're sumo wrestlers not ufc fighters.

Anonymous No. 188067

>>188060
I must be weird, but I do things like check my wallet before I leave the door.

I also consider acetone to be a normal part of the 'aggressive' cleaning supplies, alongside bleach, ammonia and isopropanol.

Anonymous No. 188070

>>188041
>>puroresu
He's got a perfect line to enter as a heal, and he's got the right physique for it to make some cash. Wise move if he goes for it imo.

Anonymous No. 188071

>>188046
>why do people talk like they want the sport to fail and cease
Because we have a bunch of >>>/reddittor/ faggots constantly shitting up your thread.

Anonymous No. 188072

Weโ€™ll always have this to remember him by. https://youtu.be/P5KZhuL2Q88?si=5EiIM-oIuPwf-IkM

Anonymous No. 188073

>>188062
But is it easy to buy seats that are together?

Anonymous No. 188080

>>188072
no, we have this one >>187139

Anonymous No. 188081

>>188041
He'll follow his true passion, to become the world's biggest paper weight

Anonymous No. 188084

>>188007
I did the same I highschool
japs are bitchmade

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188095

>>188062
>As shrimple as that.
anime is for pedophiles

Anonymous No. 188096

>>187922
Imagine how much more bullying he could have done if he used BOTH arms

Anonymous No. 188099

>>188084
it's not that, i bet there have been more gruesome acts of violence in beyas in 90s or 80s etc, but these days, this shit is reported. And JSA does not really like the sole idea that outsiders get into their shit now, which makes them look really bad. It is what it is. I bet the victims would not say anything or report anything. You can always leave they sumo world. Either you suck it up or leave. They were in the beya and kept being harrased by Hokuseiho, but somebody from outside just reported it.

Anonymous No. 188101

>>188099
The impression I get is they're still fine with some garden variety beatings or emotional bullying but anything much worse than that needs to be shut down asap. An example would be this or the Isegahama incident with the boiling water a year or two ago resulting in retirements for the perpetrators and demotions for the oyakata but the Naruto incident a couple months ago resulting in the victims retiring and no punishments.

Anonymous No. 188103

>>188101
yeah i think hitting someone with a broom may be exaggerated. probably using the spray can as flamethrower, that's a bit over the line

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Anonymous No. 188104

>>188101
>the Naruto incident
Not nearly as 'garden variety' as you make it sound.

The reason there was no punishment is because the victims retired before raising the complaint. That wasn't the case in the Isegahama, Miyagino and Michinoku incidents.

Anonymous No. 188113

imagine pissing away a 25k/month salary with massive bonuses just because you couldn't resist being a cunt to your underlings. dude is gonna be tall and poor for the rest of his life.

Anonymous No. 188122

>>188113
Maybe his family and upbringing were basically like pakis in England

Anonymous No. 188132

>>187905
Sumo was never meant to be a smelly foreigner get together. It is an honorable Japanese tradition and religious ceremony. Filthy gaijin apes have no place here.

Anonymous No. 188137

>>188062
Just a warning that the staff may be too retarded to make it happen. I brought my printed instructions in Japanese to a 7-11 in Tokyo and it took the cashier and the manager a five-minute confurensu to figure it out and print my tickets.

Anonymous No. 188151

>>187906
Gonna miss Mido throwing this motherfucker.

Anonymous No. 188158

>>188151
we still have Shounannoumi

Anonymous No. 188174

>>188084
>average 15yo bully from an am*rican school vs a 2 meter tall mongoloid raised as a wrestler

Anonymous No. 188198

>>188174
>average high school victim vs a professional rikishi

Anonymous No. 188203

what time tomorrow does the b&zuke come out?

Anonymous No. 188232

>>188203
very early in the morning, like 6:30am, when it's still Sunday in Europe

Anonymous No. 188240

How would most sumo compare to freestyle or Greco practitioners ?
Wrestling rules?
MMA rules?

Anonymous No. 188242

>>188240
Sumo is at a disadvantage under most rulesets, because a rikishi is trained to avoid touching the ground at all costs. He has no defense against attacks that come from the ground, nor does he have any offensive capability on the ground. As soon as groundwork is introduced, the rikishi must essentially abandon all his training and become a big, heavy brawler, which leaves him vulnerable to various techniques. Sumo is an incredibly specialised sport where the athletes have spent centuries focusing on and developing a metagame, to the point that their skills are a liability in a more open competition. It will always be easier for someone from another combat sport to get good at sumo than the other way around.

Anonymous No. 188252

>>188242
Interesting. What about a street fight where you want to avoid going to the concrete at all cost?

Anonymous No. 188256

>>188252
Sumo, in a self defense situation, is surprisingly effective. As shown by YouTuber Sensei Seth in the YouTuber self defence clash, Sumo's emphasis on explosive rushing is situationally beneficial. A street fight could conceivably be one of those situations.

However, the most effective form of self defence in a street fight is not being in one. Followed by having a group of young, aggressive, loyal male friends, followed by having a weapon. Then, and only if you have failed at the first three stages, should how good you are at unarmed combat be relevant.

Anonymous No. 188259

>>188252
If there are no rules at all, the stability and explosive force of sumo can be helpful, but given that there's no ring to push your opponent out of, and the fact he can get back up if you send him to the ground, the fight is likely to last longer than the average sumo match, which again puts a rikishi at a disadvantage. Realistically, sumo's main transferable skill is simply being large and powerful - there's not much in it that's geared towards actual fighting. Under the sumo ruleset, a rikishi is perfect, outside of sumo he's sub-optimal in many ways.

Anonymous No. 188260

>>188256
>Pacifist bullshit

Most guys who are interested in self defence don't have a hooligan gang to back them or laws banning firearms or knives

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Anonymous No. 188272

>>188240
>>188242
>>188252
>freestyle or Greco rules?
The strength of sumo in grappling is the same reason for its weakness. Like others said, there's no groundwork at all since the match ends in sumo if it goes there, so a sumotori is clueless if it lands there. Having said that, what makes sumo strong (and other grappling arts with "no-touching other than soles" rules like Chinese wrestling or Mongolian wrestling) is that it is damned hard to get them to go to the ground in the first place.

If you train with the mindset that you lose when even a finger brushes the ground, you get a very high level of balance, body awareness, and sensitivity that you don't see to the same degree in other martial arts. A freestyle or folkstyle guy might run to his knees to make a takedown or scramble happen if they can't get one standing. A BJJ guy might pull guard and a judo/sambo guy might do a sacrifice throw for similar reasons. But a sumo guy? Good fucking luck trying to get them down when they won't even concede an inch.

Webm related. Here's Takeshi Amitani (never went pro but won multiple amateur Japan nationals) vs Curtis Blaydes (All American wrestler and top ten UFC heavyweight).

>MMA rules?
You can't go into MMA with JUST sumo, but it can be great to train as a supplement. Lyoto Machida trained in amateur sumo in Brazil and was extremely hard to take down and he fought some high level wrestlers.

>>188259
>but given that there's no ring to push your opponent out
Environmental hazards in a street fight are real.
https://youtu.be/XOQrhmibWRs?si=tZVJzpPtTHEbsGH6&t=17

>he can get back up if you send him to the ground
Shiko stomp his head after you take him down.

>not much in it that's geared towards actual fighting
Pushing/thrusting can be of (limited) use in combat sports and da street. The wrestling in sumo is sound and really not that different from other wrestling. An underhook is an underhook regardless of whether you're wearing a mawashi, gi, or singlet.

Anonymous No. 188279

Most dangerous pro wrestler was makushitter
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_5_J8d6B9s

Anonymous No. 188280

>>188272
Why don't judo or wrestling moves work in sumo??
It seems like everything is allowed but they don't use anything?

Anonymous No. 188282

>>188280
They do use judo. A lot. Judo schools are actually one of the main stomping grounds for sumo scouts. They just can't use any judo technique that requires grabbing anything other than the belt or wrist, nor any that have you touch the ground with anything but the soles of your feet.

Anonymous No. 188285

>>188282
What's more prestigious in Japan, Judo or sumo?
Which are better paid?
Do they get laid a lot and party, or are they all very focused and virtuous?

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Anonymous No. 188291

>>188280
Judo moves are highly popular, as the other anon said a lot of kids get scouted from Judo into Sumo.
The real problem here is weight, trying to throw a guy weighing 300+lbs is a great way to end up destroying your shoulders.
Chiyonofuji is a great example of this, smaller muscle wrestler that used a lot of throws until the injuries began to pile up, at which point he focused more on frontal force outs and straight forward power.

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Anonymous No. 188292

Anonymous No. 188293

I attended an amateur sumo event. Outside of the hip hop, neighborhood DJ, beatboxing, slam poetry, taiko drum halftime performance, and speeches on black and japanese history, the sumo was okay.

Anonymous No. 188296

>>188292
saw this chiyonofuji vs wakashimazu match yesterday, what a fight

https://youtu.be/M5-G6FM19CQ?t=815

Anonymous No. 188305

>>188293
Fucking hipsters

Anonymous No. 188307

>>188279
>sent by your king at 15 to learn sumo
>make it to MS27 at the age of 17
>stable master dies, forced to retire with a 48-25 record
>makushitter

Anonymous No. 188310

>>188293
inb4 โ€œSumo was invented in Africa to evade slavecatchersโ€

Anonymous No. 188313

>>188293
>hip hop
>beatboxing
>slam poetry
>black history
HONU SUMO STRIKES AGAIN

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Anonymous No. 188328

20 minutes until the new Banzuke drops

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Anonymous No. 188330

It's up

https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/

Anonymous No. 188331

>>188330
>Oho from m10 to m3
Prepare for complete shitshow

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Anonymous No. 188332

>>188331
Either he climbs up to Sekiwake or returns to sub M10, no inbetween.

Anonymous No. 188333

>>188330
>Hokuseiho at J3E
The "retirement" was a trick to get Hakuho's enemies to expose themselves. Expect a video from Chris-sama within the hour.

Anonymous No. 188334

>>188333
He retired too late. Could have saved Tenshoho had he retired earlier.

Anonymous No. 188335

>>188334
As if having your wallet superglued together wasn't enough...

Anonymous No. 188339

>>188330
>takarafuji m17
He must be well liked or the streak is important for him to survive

Anonymous No. 188340

>>188339
That's TakErufuji, Takarafuji is J1w. It's over.

Anonymous No. 188344

>>188330
Endo is so close to finally fucking off

Anonymous No. 188348

>>188260
Yeah, you tell him. Get into that knife fight! I'm sure you won't bleed out in three seconds after he nicks an artery.

Anonymous No. 188353

>>188348
Clearly the meta for knife fighting is the same as sumo - bulk up as much as possible to bury your arteries under a thick layer of protective fat.

Anonymous No. 188367

>>188330
RIP Chiyomaru

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Anonymous No. 188370

Anonymous No. 188373

>>188370
This is disgraceful sumo has gone soft.

Anonymous No. 188374

>>188370
Awesome. Hokuseiho out, paramedics in. This might be the best basho ever.

Anonymous No. 188378

>Takarafuji Juryo 1
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ;_;

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Anonymous No. 188381

>last general died before the banzuke was released
APOLOGIZE

Anonymous No. 188382

>>188381
Now imagine starting a thread with a new banzuke.

Anonymous No. 188386

>>188330
>https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/
>Miyagino has only one wrestler in the salaried ranks and that one is at the ass end of juryo, j13w
Hakuho sucks as a coach

Anonymous No. 188387

>>188382
Okay, I'll write up the OP give me a few minutes

Anonymous No. 188388

Anyone heard any news on Hokutofuji's condition?

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Anonymous No. 188395

Look at the fucking havoc that Pain Basho 2024 has wrought upon the banzuke- though the wallet gluing faggot that stood around and made me late for work with his bullshit style is gone thank christ so theres that. All I can think about is my fucking guy Hokutofuji; the goddamn soul of sumo.

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Anonymous No. 188399

>>188388
HokutOVER

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Anonymous No. 188400

>>188330
Kotonowaka completed his first mission getting to ozeki now itโ€™s time for the assassin to win a title
>>188395
Kotonowaka is the soul of sumo

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Anonymous No. 188404

>>188399
You will never break the heart of sumo

Anonymous No. 188409

>>188370
>Paramedics
Yamato-damashii-brothers...

Anonymous No. 188416

>>188353
Pussy cope. I'm a nerd but even I've been in several fights in the street over meaningless ego bullshit. It was probably the most fun a person can have, unforgettable memories and pure adrenaline rush. A weapon was never produced although I was almost hit with a chair once kek. Now go back to coping and playing mental gymnastics over why being cowardly is virtuos

Anonymous No. 188419

>>188416
Watch out lads, we've got an S-tier street brawler here with us today. Better not insult him or his ego might make him lash out.

Anonymous No. 188425

>>188370
Even if the medical assistance during bashos has been improving alot in the past two years, I wonder if paramedics getting introduced right now was affected by Hokutofujis injury (Rijichos sekitori)

Anonymous No. 188426

Just realized: Hak's demotion could be the end for Enho. His influence could've been crucial to help Enho with acquiring a stock. Not anymore, I guess.
Approaching 30s, manlet, broken body, no place in sumo... lil' nigga deserved better.

Anonymous No. 188428

>>188426
>Enho agrees to dish the dirt on Hakuho in exchange for a bit of rule-bending regarding elder stock
Remember, we still don't know who took the Hokuseiho business to the higher-ups in the first place. It's a doggy dog world in sumo.

Anonymous No. 188444

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qM-eL7KFWQg
Newest Schriszoid headcannon video is out

Anonymous No. 188448

>>188428
Would've been wild.
Ehno's like his #1 OG protege. His little son. Favorite son. Hak even allowed him to do this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_Snp5jaRK4
>>188444
Takanohana-esque, Joe.

Anonymous No. 188450

>>188444
Lmao if true
>Hakuho cup for youngsters
>younger talent join up with Hakuho
nOoOo HoW CoUlD tHiS HaPpEn

Anonymous No. 188459

>>188444
jfc, closed the video at 1:14, what is this ass-kissing shit.

Anonymous No. 188465

>>188426
There never was a place in sumo for him to begin with, manlets don't belong in the sport. He should've been a jockey or something.

Anonymous No. 188470

how are stables supposed to recruit normally? like barring your dad is the oyakata - do the coaches recruit you like a cfb coach?
i don't know how they could be salty that hakuho has a tournament that he can use to recruit people if they don't have their own tournaments and shit. it's like some d3 school getting mad at bama

Anonymous No. 188472

>>188426
He'll make it on the variety show circuit or something.

Anonymous No. 188473

>>188470
Generally coaches will attend high-school tournaments and visit individual schools looking for promising young men at the sumo clubs. They'll often revisit a particular school many times over the years, because a young Japanese kid is more likely to agree to join a stable if his senpai went there last year and posted on LINE about how great it is. The Hakuho Cup seriously disrupts this, because it means that the best young lads in the nation will be going directly to Hakuho himself, who then gets first pick of the talent. It would be very interesting if Hakuho left (or was forced out of) the JSA and put his full attention onto amasumo, because there's a strong chance that a lot of boys who would otherwise have joined a stable would instead choose to take part in the Hakuho League.

Anonymous No. 188474

>>188370
Now there's literally no reason to not raise the dohyo

Anonymous No. 188475

>>188279
Didn't know Haku was a rikishi...

Anonymous No. 188476

>>188330
>Tamawashi is the sole remaining gaijin in that photo
based Mongorian!

Anonymous No. 188479

>>188476
Tiddy-sama is still around, hes in juryo now

Anonymous No. 188482

Does Hokuseiho just get to leave scot-free?
I'm not expecting him to get knee-capped or anything but motherfucker has just murdered Hakuho's hopes and dreams. Or at least delayed it a good 10+ years

Anonymous No. 188483

>>188450
tl;dr Hakuho should have bent the knee to the Nipponese boomers instead of being the person most responsible for raising awareness of and prospects for sumo since the Hawaiians pushed it into the Western consciousness.
On the other hand, it was retarded to try to cover up Hokuseiho's behavior when he wasn't even around to prevent it, apparently.

>>188426
It was shocking to me that he discussed wanting to return to the ring after his physicians told him to stop practicing the sport before he permanently cripples himself. Little guy's walking back into the meat grinder, worse for wear.

Anonymous No. 188484

>>188482
I'm sure Hokuseiho will be made to feel very unwelcome in Tokyo until he scuttles off back home, but the Boss knows he only has himself to blame for how things turned out.

Anonymous No. 188486

You can mock him all you want, but we all know you'd live in fear of Chris reading your mind if you ever dared to step foot in Japan

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Anonymous No. 188488

kek what was going through Tenshoho's mind during this
>that slight flinch 17 seconds in

Anonymous No. 188492

>>188486
>chris triggers me because he has far better insight into the sumo world than i do

Anonymous No. 188494

>>188488
>Why couldn't I get my wallet open earlier?

Anonymous No. 188497

>>188479
Is that Aoiyamma? I thought it was somebody else that got the boot for weed back in the day.

Anonymous No. 188499

>>188488
>what was going through Tenshoho's mind during this
>g'dammit, not again...

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Anonymous No. 188500

Weird rikishi I found trawling sumodb. I don't think I've ever seen another career resembling this.

Anonymous No. 188502

>>188293
WE WUZ CHANKO COOKIN' N SHEEIT

Anonymous No. 188512

>>188500
the fuck

Anonymous No. 188514

>>188473
>The Hakuho Cup seriously disrupts this, because it means that the best young lads in the nation will be going directly to Hakuho himself, who then gets first pick of the talent
What kind of Chris-tier schizo conspiracy theory is this?

The Hakuho Cup is a big tournament, but it's only for elementary-to-junior high kids. It can only be a net-win for the JSA since it gets young kids more interested in sumo. The high school tournaments are still bigger and more prestigious. Even if we assume Hakuho gets to poach people, let's look at how Hakuho Cup participants who went pro ended up.

>Kawazoe/Kiho (Miyagino)
>Onosho (Onomatsu)
>Ura (Kise)
>Kotonowaka (Sadogatake)
>Roga (Futagoyama)
>Onosato (Nishonoseki)
>Ochiai/Hakuoho (Miyagino)
>Tenshoho (Miyagino)
>Kawabuchi (Shikoroyama)
>Kototebakari (Sadogatake)
>Yoshii (Tokitsukaze)
>Nishida (Nishonoseki)

There's only 3 Miyagino recruits compared to everybody else. Joining Miyagino could easily be explained by wanting to train with the GOAT.

Anonymous No. 188517

>>188500
The 'not dropping rank despite missing a basho' bit is probably because of the Public Injury System they had at the time, but it's still an amazingly uppy/downy career.

Anonymous No. 188521

ayo does anyone knows why Tochimaru Masanori was absent for so long? in western media, as someone who can't read moonrunes, it's impossible to get informations about stuff like that.

Anonymous No. 188522

>>188521
I can't find anything at all about his injury in Japanese, either. It's not terribly rare for this to happen, but it's always strange.

Anonymous No. 188523

>>188514
>Joining Miyagino could easily be explained by wanting to train with the GOAT.
right, he tricks promising talent into joining his shit tier stable thats run by the lowest ranking elder in sumo

Anonymous No. 188529

>>188523
He doesn't even run it, he spends all his time on his many other ventures, he only shows up to make things look like he runs the place when he knows the media will be around

Anonymous No. 188532

>>188529
>his many other ventures
such as

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Anonymous No. 188534

>>188532
Working the sumo gift shop with Kaisei.

Anonymous No. 188535

>>188534
i would blow all my money on merch if hakuho and kaisei told me to. Especially Kaisei, love that guy.

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Anonymous No. 188537

>that one rikishi who snitched and killed Hakuho's career.
Hakuho fucked up big time, this even might be the end of Miyagino stable. Just imagine the absolute demoralization and mental boom on the wrestlers there, from living in a crowed building under the pressure of working with the biggest name on sport ever to dealing with guys that had career injuries in the past year, to all the shit that went down this past week and even more from the future to come and now having to deal with outsider help to keep afloat. From now on they are gonna be on Hakuho's ass until he snaps. He truly gathered a lot of enemies on the way up.

>forced to do wageslave tier jobs until who knows when
abysmal situation, it's literally over.

๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188541

>>188537
The thing is he'd have probably just gotten a slap on the wrist if he'd have thrown Hokustandho under the bus. For all the conjecture of evil racist Jap boomers of the NSK keeping elder Hakuho down just like they did when he was active, his post-retirement career was proceeding swimmingly. They could've written it off as "one bad apple" and "prease understando sumo culture" and it'd have died in a week. But because Hakuho tried to cover it up, it made national news because all the bullying happened under the GOAT's watch.

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Anonymous No. 188542

>>188537
The thing is he'd have probably just gotten a slap on the wrist if he'd have thrown Hokustandho under the bus. For all the conjecture of evil racist Jap boomers of the NSK keeping elder Hakuho down just like they did when he was active, his post-retirement career was proceeding swimmingly. They could've written it off as "one bad apple" and "prease understando sumo culture" and it'd have died in a week. But because Hakuho tried to cover it up, it made national news because all the bullying happened under the GOAT's watch.

Don't know why Hakuho is so attached to this retard. It doesn't seem like his heart was ever really into sumo.

Anonymous No. 188545

>>188542
>because Hakuho tried to cover it up, it made national news
>because all the bullying happened under the GOAT's watch.
those are two different becauses

Anonymous No. 188547

>>188545
Yeah I could've worded that better. Him being the goat AND him trying to cover it up is why it made national news. Some random ex-maegashitter oyakata getting caught for the same thing wouldn't have the same impact on the news cycle.

Anonymous No. 188548

>>188547
In other words people giving news articles views are responsible?
We are all responsible for what happened to Hakuho.

Anonymous No. 188551

At the very least, seeing the GOAT's career get snapped might force other oyakatas to actually start fighting against hazing.
2011 rid sumo of collusions.
2024 might do the same to bullying.

No matter how archaic you are, there's simply no fighting the free press titan that is the internet. All will come to light.

Anonymous No. 188552

>>188551
If the Tokitsukaze murder didn't do it, I don't know how this will. Maybe twitter could do it, but I'd expect this year would need at least one more incident for that.

Anonymous No. 188557

>>188523
That would be Otake stable. Itโ€™s run by a guy who never even got to makuuchi. Poor Oho.

That said, itโ€™s interesting that the previous GOAT was also pretty crummy as a stable master.

Anonymous No. 188559

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOusx6Z6jBE
New Chriskino.
Full LARP mode activated.
I warned you.

Anonymous No. 188560

>>188559
Hakuho dindu nuffin, he's a good boy

Anonymous No. 188561

>>188559
he's doing the sumo version of this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9b9hdPFGn8

Anonymous No. 188563

>>188559
For fuck's sake Chris, you did so well covering it all and now it's back to the fanfic shit.

Anonymous No. 188564

>>188557
This should scare the oyakatas and encourage permanent sandanmeshitters to speak out, since they aren't getting a sumo career anyway. Also that's just the way japs are. They'll cling to their ancient garbage practices until shit hits the fan hard enough. After that, they tend to reflect pretty well.

Anonymous No. 188565

DESU, it's astonishing how Chris is able to put one larp after another in video format, and get such attention.
In just 2 days he played JSA and Hakuho like sock puppets.

Anonymous No. 188566

>>188559
Came here to post this.

Itโ€™s actually been a while since weโ€™ve had some pure, uncut Chrizophrenia. That video was bananas.

Anonymous No. 188567

>>188566
The arguments brought up were mostly reasonable, but the format is nothing less than insulting. Just fucking present it as your opinions, damn it. There's nothing wrong with it.

Anonymous No. 188568

>>188567
>Just fucking present it as your opinions, damn it. There's nothing wrong with it.
But then it's not "gonzo"!

Anonymous No. 188569

>>188568
>What Chris would like to say to /sumo/ chiefs
How dare you treat me this way, when I have done so much more for the English-speaking sumo community than you have, with your rigid and archaic 105-unique-posters system!

Anonymous No. 188570

>>188548
Truly a million hands squeezing the superglue bottle

Anonymous No. 188571

>>188566
>>188559
Are you lads, like those of the commentors, genuinely NPCs?

This isn't Chris's position. This isn't heat Chris thinks. This is, by virtue of it not actually being Hakuho's voice, obviously Chris summing up what he believes are the arguments in defense of (and the last one, against) Hak.

And it's done this way - in first person - for entertainment purposes. This isn't mind reading or schizophrenia. It's entertaininment. Editorializing. There is an unspoken "this is what Hakuho might be thinking" at the beginning of the video. If you can't realise that, your probably also can't imagine an apple and you just say you can so you don't get bullied here.

Anonymous No. 188572

>>188571
>unfamiliar with Chris schizoposting
Itโ€™s okay, anon. We were all new once. Feel free to ask questions. This thread is actually very comfy and welcoming.

Anonymous No. 188573

>>188571
>Chris summing up what he believes are the arguments
So you understand completely but came to the wrong conclusion anyway? Welcome to /sumo/, hope you had fun your first basho, enjoy your stay

Anonymous No. 188574

>leave for like a week
>miss this absolute shitshow and the tree going down

Anonymous No. 188575

Is Hokuseiho going to get a haircutting ceremony? What would that even be like? Who would show up?

Anonymous No. 188576

>>188575
>Is Hokuseiho going to get a haircutting ceremony?
No. He'll have to shamefully wear his chonmage forever.

Anonymous No. 188577

>>188576
Kek no I meant like, does he just go to the barber if heโ€™s been fired or does he get a small but heartfelt thing at the stable like the career makushitters get?

Anonymous No. 188578

>>188577
>heartfelt thing at the stable
If I was Hokuseiho, I wouldn't give my stablemates a sharp pair of scissors and then sit with my back turned to them.

Anonymous No. 188580

>>188571
And yet he chooses to present it as if these are Hakuho's own thoughts. The content of the video is about the hypocrisy of the JSA, and how they have chosen not to punish other stables for similar (and dissimilar) infringements. But he chooses to frame it as Hakuho's own thoughts rather than his own perspective on a contentious issue. It's about the deliberate framing.
And then there's the part where he goes:
>Given the violent nature of bouts... is what Hokuseiho did to juniors any worse than what was done to you during your careers?
Apparently Chris has knowledge that we don't about the "steal your opponent's money and then glue their wallet together" kimarite.

Anonymous No. 188583

>>188575
>who would show up
the fire department hopefully

Anonymous No. 188586

>>188534
how they gonna stop him from commentating if the station invites him personally?
more people interested in what he has to say vs. all the other shitters on the board combined

Anonymous No. 188587

>>188559
Chris schizo headcanon sumo best sumo

Anonymous No. 188596

>>188571
thanks for your service chris

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Anonymous No. 188600

the mongolian menace will be eradicated and the dohyo will be purified from their stain

Anonymous No. 188605

>>188537
>they are gonna be on Hakuho's ass until he snaps. He truly gathered a lot of enemies on the way up.

This.

They will not stop until Hakuho resigns from the JSA, or they can find a way to kick him out.

Anonymous No. 188606

>>188559
Quit advertising that stupid fuckers garbage in this thread, only you faggots give two shits about that cunt, or his stupid "opinions".

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Anonymous No. 188611

>>188566
>Came here to post this.
You've got to go back, faggot.

Anonymous No. 188615

>>188611
>t. Chris

Anonymous No. 188616

>>188559
>Takatoriki mentioned

Never change, Chris...

Anonymous No. 188618

>>188616
Do you think every time Takatouriki posts Ouhou thinks
>Dad, please stop posting. Justโ€ฆstop.

Anonymous No. 188635

>>188559
>what hakuho would like to say to sumo chiefs
holy shit even for chris thats an insane title

Anonymous No. 188642

>>188534
Your rank determines if you can be a guest commentator? Really?

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Anonymous No. 188644

>hakuho: kokugikan toilet cleaner

Anonymous No. 188645

>>188537
He should just start his own league elsewhere and take everything 1:1 from the JSA since they have no international treaty protecting the sport.
Tbh if I was him I'd be airing every tiny tiny bit of dirty laundry I had heard of in the past 20 years.

I'd destroy the sport if I was him. It's on its death bed anyway

Anonymous No. 188646

crash this bitch with no survivors

hatsu 2024 last basho ever

Anonymous No. 188648

>>188645
He's not THAT rich.

Anonymous No. 188656

>>188642
No, but the Association can probably 'strongly advise' that the network not have him on.

Anonymous No. 188661

>>188644
15 toilets cleaned, 0 left dirty.
zensho-bathroon for Hakuho the toilet GOAT!

Anonymous No. 188664

>>188642
No but they can probably hoist additional busy work on him to tie up his time

Anonymous No. 188668

JSA: OK Hakuho, we gave you Japanese citizenship and elder stock and your own stable, just like you said you wanted, thanks for being such a good wrestler
Hakuho: Thanks JSA, I always wanted to have my own stable, I promise to do a good job with it
Hakuho: *procedes to completely ignore his stable and focus exclusively on side ventures, tv appearances and other personal self glorification*
JSA: Hakuho your stable has turned to shit because of your own willful negligence so we're holding you responsible for the way you decided to behave
Hakuho: NOOOOO!!!! THATS RACIST!!! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!! THATS NOT FAIR!!! I'M A SUPER SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE!!! MUH YUSHOS MUFFUGGUH!!!! REEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Anonymous No. 188670

>>188668
>procedes to completely ignore his stable and focus exclusively on side ventures, tv appearances and other personal self glorification
To be fair, he has to capitalize on it while people are still interested and while he still looking the part.

Anonymous No. 188671

Wow he really said that?

Anonymous No. 188673

Rumors are now spreading in the Jap press saying that Miyagino stable is going to be liquidated and Isegahama stable is going to absorb all the wrestlers from Miyagino.
Asahifuji is the current Isegahama boss and he turns 65 in just over a year, just in time for Terunofuji's impending retirement.

Anonymous No. 188681

>>188673
It will be insane if the punishment for allowing a deshi to bully other deshi ends up the same as the punishment for literally murdering a deshi.

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188682

>>188681
>NOOOOOOO!!!
>DATZ NOT FAIR!!!!
>REEEEEEEEE!!!!!

๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188683

Which one, /sumo/?

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Anonymous No. 188684

>>188642
No, they have guys who've been long retired from the NSK on commentary.

>>188681
It's nothing to do with the bullying and everything to do with the cover-up/PR nightmare. Every elder got the shit beaten out of them and would gladly do it to their recruits if it wasn't harder to get away with it in current year.

Putting the bullying aside

>Hokuseiho was abusing his schoolmates as far back as his high school sumo days
>Hokuseiho's high school sumo program is run by Ishiura's dad so they can't have Ishiura take over because he might be in on it
>Hakuho lied about Hokuseiho having injuries to pull out of the basho
>Hakuho hired a third party to obfuscate the NSK's investigation into the abuse
It's hard to tell as a non-moon runes reader relying on Google Translate how much is true and how much are allegations, but it's pretty bad.

https://news.yahoo.co.jp/articles/0f74263f8c72557a9c9b9fbb28606ade7cb2c546

Anonymous No. 188685

>>188682
The unfair part would be letting Kasugano, Isegahama, Michinoku, Naruto etc off the hook for the exact same thing. IIRC this would be the first scandal-based stable deletion since Tokitsukaze, which is why I'm equating it.

Anonymous No. 188686

>>188684
It doesn't say anything about hiring a third party. I'm pretty sure they only mean that he, as a third party, interfered with the investigation by trying to buy the silence of the families.

>how much is true and how much are allegations
Most of the content of the article is the speculation of "a young oyakata" and "a sumo reporter". Doesn't mean they're wrong, but none of it is being presented as fact in the text.

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Anonymous No. 188687

Which one, /sumo/?

Anonymous No. 188688

>>188687
ura > chiyomaru > kagayaki

Anonymous No. 188689

>>188648
That's why you get sponsors, investors etc.
Probably a waste though. The sport is on its last legs. Too many more exciting and more popular combat sports exist, and Japan has pivoted to Baseball and even American Football over fat man tussle.

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Anonymous No. 188690

>>188689
>The sport is on its last legs.

Anonymous No. 188692

>>188690
>w*stoid shenanigans

Anonymous No. 188693

>>188692
I only mean that it wouldn't take much for its popularity to explode back to earlier levels. A half-assed, unsanctioned event got 5,000 seats filled because someone paid to market it.

Anonymous No. 188697

>>188645
why would he copy? he can do mongolian wrestling league any time.

Anonymous No. 188700

>>188697
He isn't famous for Mongolian wrestling.

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Anonymous No. 188701

>>188697
>he can do mongolian wrestling league any time.
It doesn't make any money. Which is why you see Mongolians moving to Japan to do sumo and not the other way around.

>>188645
>>188689
>It's on its death bed anyway
>The sport is on its last legs

Anonymous No. 188704

>>188701
Yeah, they just massively increased the salary scale at all levels at the start of the year too

Anonymous No. 188706

>>188701
>Asahifuji is the current Isegahama boss and he turns 65
so Teru takes over? did they ever anticipated anything about it?

Anonymous No. 188707

>>188704
That might be due to inflation.

Anonymous No. 188708

>>188687
I would instantly stan for a rikishi in a banana yellow mawashi.

Anonymous No. 188709

>>188706
I vaugely remember some rumours last year about Terunofuji starting his own stable and another elder already at Isegahama taking over. However I think there is also a policy of trying to reduce the number of stables right now so I don't know how that is supposed to work.

Anonymous No. 188714

>>188688
>chiyomaru
not anymore

Anonymous No. 188716

>>188661
>Didn't wash your hands? Heres kachiage to the face

Anonymous No. 188723

>>188714
No...

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188729

Takatoriki talking about instances of modern rikishi being forced to [spoiler]cover their fingers with glue and then stick them up their butts.[/spoler]
https://youtu.be/IKvn7_k2d4M?t=428

Can't wait for Chris to cover it and the reactions that will follow.

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Anonymous No. 188730

Takatoriki talking about instances of modern rikishi being forced to [spoiler]cover their fingers with glue and then stick them up their butts.[/spoiler]
https://youtu.be/IKvn7_k2d4M?t=428 [Embed]

Can't wait for Chris to cover it and the reactions that will follow.

Anonymous No. 188735

>>188730
What the fuck is wrong with japs?

Anonymous No. 188738

>>188730
Ah, the olโ€™ sticky oil check.

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Anonymous No. 188776

>>188730
>rikishi being forced to cover their fingers with glue and then stick them up their butts
Hakuho really picked a wild one...
>>188735
Its not japs. Its more accusations coming out regarding Hokuseiho and his deeds

Anonymous No. 188778

>>188776
The butt thing wasn't about Hokuseiho. It was a random example of the kind of shit that presumably happens these days with Takatoriki refusing to list any names.

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Anonymous No. 188782

>>188778
maybe I should stay away from clickbait jap youtube vids kek

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188787

>Japs should just tolerate foreigners running amok in their country

Anonymous No. 188795

>>188787
>"recently reported"
>video is from May 2023
>no such protests happened
this is surely a reputable twitter account. the checkmark seals it for me honestly

Anonymous No. 188804

>>188787
I BLAME BUDDHISM

Anonymous No. 188805

>>188690
I think I could win the usa open if I entered

Anonymous No. 188806

>24hrs without another new Chris video
help me cope

Anonymous No. 188807

>11 more days 'till basho
Can we just start already?

Anonymous No. 188809

>>188778
>Takatoriki refusing to list any names
that's not like him at all

Anonymous No. 188811

God I hate Chrisnoredditor posting

Anonymous No. 188812

>>188809
Poor nigga had his butt plugged and glued shut. I wouldn't be mentioning his name without an explicit permission too.

Anonymous No. 188813

>>188811
There's at least 3 of us and none of us are Chris, so make it 4.

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Anonymous No. 188814

>>188813
4chan is a pro-Chris website, always has been

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Anonymous No. 188822

New Chris video!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNfvVakV60M

Anonymous No. 188826

>>188822
Thank you for your service, in bearing the Word of our Lord and Saviour Chris-sama to the masses. Chris-sama (PBUH) knows your name, and you shall be rewarded at the Great Senshuraku that awaits us all.

Anonymous No. 188844

Why didn't Hakuho discipline Hokuseiho? He was aware that he had a bad name with the JSA and should be cautious, right?

Anonymous No. 188845

>>188844
A couple possibilities:
- he didnโ€™t know
- he didnโ€™t care
- he approved of the bullying
- he tried to discipline him and it simply didnโ€™t work

The issue is not the bullying itself, thatโ€™s common enough and all the stable masters have dealt with it from time to time. If that were all it was, Hakuho would get a lecture but not this public shaming.

The real problem was that he ignored/stonewalled the JSA when they made inquiries. If youโ€™re not going to be a team player, the other elders WILL make an example out of you.

Anonymous No. 188854

https://www.asahi.com/sp/ajw/articles/15182375
>To prevent such acts, it is vital to strengthen community oversight with experienced and knowledgeable supervisors and transition from traditional customs and coaching methods toward healthier and scientific ways to train and develop wrestlers.
>toward healthier and scientific ways
>"What do you mean you need surgery? I fixed my knee with shiko and chanko"

Anonymous No. 188865

Did Hakuoho know about the Hokuseiho situation when he volunteered to be his tsukebito? Was this a 4d chess move to make Hokuseiho less likely to act like an adversary to him?

Anonymous No. 188866

>>188865
I think it's pretty clear that, as good as he was at sumo, Hakuho's playing 1D chess at the most at this point.

Anonymous No. 188867

>>188866
Hakuoho not Hakuho

Anonymous No. 188870

>>188865
Hakuoho resented being given that shikona and caused the downfall of Hokuseiho so that Hakuho's career would implode and he could change to a better shikona.

Anonymous No. 188871

>>188867
I WILL make that mistake again.

Anonymous No. 188872

>>188870
The worst has happened. Miyagino-oyakata has been found guilty of being Mongolian and has been summarily executed by the JSA. All wrestlers in Miyagino-beya whose names are homages to Hakuho must change their names immediately or risk forced retirement. What are their new names?

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Anonymous No. 188873

>>188872
>oy vey you can't discipline mongolians
>dats raysis!!
>hakuho dindu nuffin, he a good boy

Anonymous No. 188874

>>188845
>- he didnโ€™t know
This would be the worst one.
Means that he's absolutely unfit to lead.
Imagine being in such position of power, and not even having a rat to report you everything what's going on in YOUR stable. Not only that, his #1 protege Ishiura is an oyakata as well. Enho hangs around there too.
A fly can't shit in the heya without Hak's knowledge.
>- he didnโ€™t care
Cared enough to hide it.
>- he approved of the bullying
Prolly not, but who knows.
>- he tried to discipline him and it simply didnโ€™t work
Most likely. Hokuseiho is just a big and violent retards. Can't be helped.

Anonymous No. 188876

>>188844
Mongolians prefer to keep it in-house. The whole Harumafuji incident happened because Hakuho was lecturing a young mongol wrestler and they weren't listening.

๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188880

>>188876
*Asashoryu

Harumafuji is the footballer

Anonymous No. 188883

>>188845
Wasn't there some comment from Hakuho last tournament along the lines of
>Maybe now he'll listen [to his oyakata]
If I'm recalling correctly, it makes it sound like Hakuho tried and failed to discipline him, which honestly makes him look worse.

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Anonymous No. 188885

>>188822
>be miyagino-beya wrestler
>tall, dark, and retarded beats me, steals my money, and superglues my ass cheeks together
>he gets himself dishonorably discharged
>finally, it's over
>miyagino-oyakata gets demoted out of existence despite being the undisputed GOAT
>we're not allowed to leave the stable
>no one is allowed in
>we're not allowed to celebrate the tournament
>JSA quarantines our stable as "a test" and threatens to dissolve it, an admission that they're looking for any excuse to do it

Anonymous No. 188889

>>188885
>be miyagino-beya wrestler
>stable gets dissolved by vengeful ojisans
>be transferred to new stable
>still get bullied

Anonymous No. 188892

This whole thing is really silly, a massive scandal over common pranks. These guys must be really bored.

Anonymous No. 188895

>>188892
Common pranks like stealing wallets and setting people on fire

Anonymous No. 188901

>>188892
>bored
yes
>massive scandal
yes
>common pranks
personally I don't prefer to have my surgically reconstructed elbow deconstructed by a 6'8 mongolian

Anonymous No. 188902

>>188883
>Maybe now he'll listen [to his oyakata]
He said a bunch of cryptic stuff about the 'injury' including that, as well as
>I think this has given him another chance, in a sense. I'm hoping we'll see a new Hokuseihou after this.

My opinion is that Hak wildly miscalculated how bad things were, or at least how bad they would be perceived.

Anonymous No. 188907

>>188901
"Common pranks" is relative. Keep in mind that a sumo stable is generally full of enormous young men with lots of testosterone, who are trained to fight and encouraged to be highly competitive, in addition to having the cultural implication that they are all modern-day samurai. Frankly, I'm surprised that rikishi aren't regularly hospitalised or permanently crippled as a result of general high spirits.

Anonymous No. 188911

>>188895
Pretty typical highschool level pranks and banter.

Anonymous No. 188912

>>188895
>>188911
JSA is a bunch of racist bigots for not allowing Hokuseiho to perform the ancient Mongolian friendship ritual of the spicy wallet.

Anonymous No. 188921

>>188902
Hakuho tried to cover it up and as is so common, the coverup ended up being equally on par with the crime in terms of repugnance. If he has been honest about the situation, including his own gross negligence, things probably would have worked out better for him. Instead he chose to take a dishonest approach, which reveals what kind of character he really is.

Anonymous No. 188924

>>188921
What kind of character is he?

๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 188940

>>188911
maybe in your shithole muttmerica this is normal, in a civilized country its not.

Anonymous No. 188968

>>188921
This anon had his wallet glued together when he was young and it scarred him for life.

Anonymous No. 188969

>>188924
a bully; with his ego, i bet he has many things under his belt. but he failed as oyakata, so that's what matters now.

Anonymous No. 188970

>>188969
Did you watch him wrestle?

Anonymous No. 188971

>>188892
>Common pranks
Getting your ass beaten by rolled up hard mawashi is prank?

Anonymous No. 188976

>>188970
what's that got to do with him failing?

Anonymous No. 188977

>>188976
Because no one who watched him wrestle would ever say that this Hokuseihou stuff revealed that he was a bully with an ego.

Anonymous No. 188978

>>188977
again, what's that got to do with being bully or not? did Hokuseiho look like a bully? no. It's ok to have a poster of Hakuho above your bed, but no need to defend him at all costs.

Anonymous No. 188979

>>188977
remember the time hakuho broke a shimpan's leg by spitefully throwing yoshikaze off the dohyo after the match was already completed.
they should've sanctioned him then, he might have learned to behave himself, instead he was allowed to continue his scummy ways and they've finally come back to bite him in this scandal
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkyYEQQAwXw

Anonymous No. 188980

>>188979
Was there a reason he threw Yoshikaze like that? Yoshikaze gave too many harite last basho?

Anonymous No. 188987

>>188978
I'm saying the opposite, newfag

Anonymous No. 188988

>>188987
>>188979
also, a bully condones another bully's actions.

Anonymous No. 188989

If Hokuseihou's activities result in a police investigation then Hakuho could end up being convicted for his part in instigating the coverup

Anonymous No. 188990

New Sumo Prime Time with Hiro Morita
This episode is about Kotonowaka
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEzhzRivs8w

Anonymous No. 189015

>>188990
>no mention of the scandal
Yet again, the genius of Chris prevails over the NSK shills.

Anonymous No. 189026

>>188885
This is really turning into a good anime plot. It's basically season 1 of Girls und Panzer with large men instead of schoolgirls.

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Anonymous No. 189040

Hakuho turned into Hakuho because he tried to do the whole respectable thing and got no respect in return. His earlier bouts as a yokozuna he would make sure people didn't fall off, politely moved them out when both knew it was over, etc. Imagine getting ten yusho and still getting shot on. Imagine almost a decade of youngsters trying everything trick in the book to get a gold star and always fighting their hardest even though they're going 5-10. Its like watching tobizaru fighting terunofuji. Tobizaru has zero respect for terunofuji's accomplishments. As a yokozuna, im sure that becomes tiresome.

Anonymous No. 189042

>>188940
no bullying in american highschools, everyone too scared of getting columbine'd

Anonymous No. 189044

>>188979
good, rise the dohkyo

Anonymous No. 189047

>>188990
fuck the forced enthusiasm of JSA productions. I'll take pessimistic chris schizo rantings over that shit any day.

Anonymous No. 189048

>>188990
Kotonowaka wins in the past 3 bashoes:
September - 9
November - 11
January - 13

so its pretty easy to project that he will score 15 in March
and 17 in May

Anonymous No. 189049

>>189040
I know this is a shitpost but it actually is pretty sad how Hakuho went from "the good yokozuna" to contrast bad boy Asashoryu, to being one more bad move away from being a sumo pariah. Kakuryu and Terunofuji must be smiling inside though since it means they just need to do the bare minimum as elders and they'll be "well they're better than Hakuho." Teru already has the goodwill of not being Hakuho giving him a screen for his own injury issues and letting people forget about his own controversies during his first ozeki tenure.

Anonymous No. 189053

>>189049
the JSA gets what they fucking deserve.

Anonymous No. 189055

>>189049
That one sumo prime time video already makes Kakuryu seems like a better elder than Hakuho.

>Hak
>exclusively signs prospects that win or place high at big amateur tournaments

>Kak
>traveled hours away from Tokyo to meet some random kid who sent him an email

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Anonymous No. 189060

>>189055
>exclusively signs prospects that win or place high at big amateur tournaments
Whatever else you want to say about him, this isn't true. There are lots of Miyagino randos who you don't know exist because no one in the sumo media said anything when they were signed.

Anonymous No. 189061

>>189060
They don't count, they got brought in as sacrifices to the Mountain that Leans so he didn't mess with the real prospects.

Anonymous No. 189063

>>189055
The truth is, sumo needs a combination of both in order to succeed. Hakuho's fatal flaw was allowing the tournaments and celebrity hobnobbing to be contextualized as benefiting him as an individual instead of sumo as a collective whole.

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Anonymous No. 189072

Anonymous No. 189082

>>189060
>2 straight years of training entirely under Hakuho
>can't get past jonidan
The goat, ladies and gentlemen.

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Anonymous No. 189084

>>189082
If you sort the banzuke by heya and go through them all, you'll see that everyone has wrestlers like these. Isegahama has raised multiple yokozuna, and also has multiple wrestlers in their 30s who've never made it to makushita.

Anonymous No. 189093

>>189082
>17
>176cm
>120kg
he was never gonna make it

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Anonymous No. 189114

me when i sit on the toilet too long and my legs fall asleep

Anonymous No. 189133

>>189084
The sumo system demands, runs on, hundreds of losers. You need chanko goons and ass wipers and kimono folders. That's not even talking about the professional losers, the ring attendants.

Also, it's hard innit. For every success, there are always 10 or more failures. People who don't have the ring sense, who can't build muscle with their fat, people who can't learn technique, people made of glass and perpetually broken.

Anonymous No. 189148

>>188971
That's literally a textbook example of a common prank.

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Anonymous No. 189174

>>189049
Both, Kakuryu and Terunofuji, have displayed the dignity and poise of a Yokozuna that should absolutely meet the standards of the JSA. Both, however, will still be shit on due to the fact that they are gaijin, and nothing will ever change that fact.

There's an interview with Akebono where he said that he left the association because he was told outright that he could, and would, NEVER be elected chairman because he was a gaijin. I understand and somewhat respect the Japanese for protecting their culture, but if you're going to restrict gaijin, then at least be honest about it and tell them up front to their faces, rather than do some shit behind their backs.

The JSA absolutely hates Hakuho because he's gaijin, didn't respect the "dignity" standards of a Yokozuna, and because he broke the shit out of most of the Japanese sumo records during his career. The JSA will find some way to either directly kick out Hakuho, or make him miserable enough over time that he resigns of his own accord. I imagine that they'd even go so far as to shut down Miyagino stable solely to eliminate the stable responsible for destroying Japanese records and accomplishments.

Sad, really...

Anonymous No. 189176

>>189174
They're not going to shut down a heya which has existed almost unbroken for 150+ years.

Anonymous No. 189177

>>189174
if hakuho didn't want to be disciplined for being a negligent stablemaster and for trying to cover up the evidence of his negligence instead of being honest about it then he should have been a diligent stablemaster when he was given the opportunity to do so.
>The JSA absolutely hates Hakuho!!
>oy vey thats so racist!!
he is widely disliked because he is a douche, theres already a number of other foreign stablemasters who aren't negligent douchebags and as a result don't draw the ire of the JSA.
Musashimaru inherited the Musashigawa name over a decade ago and hasn't had any trouble, same is true of Naruto beya except they've only been around 7 years, Kyokutenho isn't having problems either. hakuho's trouble is his own doing

Anonymous No. 189178

>>189176
Hope you're right.

Anonymous No. 189179

>>189177
>same is true of Naruto beya
lol no

Anonymous No. 189183

>>189177
Being a gaijin is fine, it's the 21st century after all. Being an uppity gaijin is not fine.

Anonymous No. 189215

>>189177
exactly, he's a douche and only gaijins like that

Anonymous No. 189225

>>189176
if they do, they're gonna get their shit slapped if they ever show their face in public

JSA needs to knocked down a few pegs.

Hope some 600lb fuck lands on old man hakakku's neck next tournament

Anonymous No. 189231

New Chris video!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsjCKrvPhI0

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Anonymous No. 189241

Anonymous No. 189246

>>189231
nice dig at the JSA in the beginning
bet they regret never letting chris be their official english commentator now

Anonymous No. 189254

>>189246
I'd like to see Chris take on Hiro Morita. Hiro would have Chris eating sand real quick

Anonymous No. 189255

>>189241
>go to half marathon in japan
>everyone there is white
wtf

Anonymous No. 189256

>>189254
would this be a sanctioned event? cause chris would fight dirty

Anonymous No. 189261

>>189256
Hironoumi can hang with the big boys, Chris would be no problem at all.

Anonymous No. 189262

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glSbU7y9rnQ
Attention! New Chriskino inbound.

Anonymous No. 189263

>>189262
and, as always, it's just him reading a newspaper article written by someone else

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 189265

>>189263
>and, as always, it's just him reading a newspaper article written by someone else

Anonymous No. 189266

>>189263
I think you mean "unparalleled level of access to the inner workings of the JSA".

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Anonymous No. 189269

Anyone who cries about muh gaijin and racism in sumo needs to kill themselves. If you join a Japanese organization you know what you signed up for. Sorry, grow up and deal with it

Anonymous No. 189275

>>189241
This dude is genuinely the coolest guy out of retirement in this sport. Everyone else remaining in the JSA is a fat fuck resting on their laurels. The guys who couldn't get in try (and fail) to do dumb shit like MMA or open up restaurants (then die of a heart attack at the ripe old age of 55). Meanwhile this guy is out here running half marathons and opens his own gym.

Anonymous No. 189276

>>189177
>at the peak of your career use cheap shots like elbowing your opponent in the face causing concussions and dazing them to win
>get reprimanded
>relent to just slapping them really fucking hard at the initial charge to accomplish same goal
>get reprimanded
>ABSOLUTELY LOSE YOUR SHIT WHEN ANYONE DOES THE SAME TO YOU
>become the top dawg of your sport where you basically used cheap shots to get ahead when it was quite obvious for anyone watching that you didn't need to, which is the most embarrassing part
>suddenly everyone acts surprised that the people you gave concussions to are now retired and doing their best to assfuck you, along with their coaches who had to watch a decade of your faggotry degrade the sport

like poetry
literally don't be an asshole and burn bridges. This is like basic life advice and ethics 101. But hakuho is a habitual bridge burner. The "sigma male grindset" doesn't work in an organization you join for life. You reap what you sow
Meanwhile shitters like Endo already have their own stable and loan out the name because he's still an active wrestler.

Anonymous No. 189278

>>189262
all these JSA board shitters need to have their nutsacks stomped flat

Anonymous No. 189279

>>189276
Agreed, but I don't think he got ahead by using cheap shots; he got ahead alongside using cheap shots. Things like forearm blasts and harite are risky moves, as if they don't work you're very likely conceding a bad belt position. Hakuho was inhumanly quick for his size and so could utilize those moves to greater effect than most.

Anonymous No. 189280

Can chris schizos keep it to the comment section of his videos or make a sub reddit? I get it, Chris exists as YOUR sole sumo source of insider JSA info , but I don't care. I can follow him on youtube as easily as you do if I cared to ever see his content.

Anonymous No. 189281

>>189276
>>189279
>NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO STOP USING THE FOREARM!! YOUR TOO GOOD AT IT!!! IT'S CHEAP!!! YOU NEED ATLEAST ONE WIN OF EACH KIMARITE PER YEAR!!!!
>Abis repeated wind pipe crushing troat thrusts, and chokes is fine. It's his only more you say? Well, it's just his brand of sumo.

Anonymous No. 189288

>>189280
Shut the fuck up, JSA shill. This is Chris territory.

Anonymous No. 189307

>>189280
>>189288
It's time to settle this once and for all.
https://poal.me/hkb1no

Anonymous No. 189334

>>189307
fuck anyone who votes JSA in the mouth and anus

chris shizo rants are canonical, just like the official power rankings

JSA doesn't mean shit, banzaku doesn't mean shit, fuck refs, fuck judges, fuck jannies, fuck trannies.


RAISE THE DOKYO

Anonymous No. 189340

>>189334
Based.

Anonymous No. 189342

>>189334
NSK is sumo you idiot. chris would be teaching english language at some random inaka school without NSK, so shut the fuck up.

Anonymous No. 189344

Pay attention to the way this NSK shill conflates NSK with the entirety of sumo:
>>189342
>NSK is sumo you idiot.

I say: DOWN with the NSK! UP with the Dohyo!

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Anonymous No. 189346

retvrn to osaka sumo

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Anonymous No. 189347

Michonoko beya is dissolving since the stablemaster reached the retirement age and has no one to replace him. Kirishima reported to be moving to Otowayama beya to train under Kakuryu.

https://www.nikkansports.com/battle/sumo/news/202403020001224.html

Anonymous No. 189361

>>189344
you have no clue what you're talking about gaijin.

Anonymous No. 189362

>>189347
What a boost for the new stable. Free ozeki

Anonymous No. 189364

>>189362
I mean, Kakuryuu taught him.

Anonymous No. 189368

>>189361
>Surely, sucking Isegahama cock would mean that I know a lot about sumo!
yawn

Anonymous No. 189370

Yeah. Takakeisho might be done.
2nd best rikishi in the modern era to never become Yokozuna, after Kaio? I feel like when he is healthy he is clearly stronger than the other 3 Ozeki, but that at least one of them will become Yoko, which seems very unlikely to him. Health is important for rikishi, after all.

His Oyakata retires in a couple of years. Wonder if he will try to stick around until that?

Anonymous No. 189371

>>189370
The thing with these neck injuries specifically is that they can never get better; they simply degrade with time. See Enhou for an obvious example. Takakeishou is unlikely to wrestle at an ozeki level again, short of a miracle.

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Anonymous No. 189373

>chris's inside pipeline to the JSA

Anonymous No. 189374

>>189276
well said

Anonymous No. 189375

>>189370
>Yeah. Takakeisho might be done.
Are you just saying that because or was there some article published somewhere

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Anonymous No. 189376

>>189370
>2nd best rikishi in the modern era to never become Yokozuna, after Kaio?
Takakeisho is more accomplished on paper sure, but I rate Goeido higher. Keisho at his best was a good/great ozeki, but never had that razzle dazzle yokozuna factor. He benefited more from being a big fish in a small pond. When Goeido was on, he was yokozuna caliber for sure. One of sumo's biggest what ifs had he remained injury-free.

Anonymous No. 189377

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Efy4YltALUI
>Hakuho's supporter beat up some poor city council member in front of dozens of people and then proceeded to threaten him into silence
>Hakuho does nothing

Wow, even his sponsors are violent assholes. No hin'ii to be found in his vicinity whatsoever. Good riddance, Miyagino beya. You WON'T be missed.

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Anonymous No. 189378

>>189376
you are not remembering goeido correctly. he was shodai when trusting the plan actually works.

Anonymous No. 189379

>>189376
Keisho when uninjured was almost guaranteed to get 11+ wins and to compete for the tournament.
Too bad he was almost never uninjured. Even his last title he somehow won while injured.

Anonymous No. 189380

>>189379
In all the tournaments he won, all the big dogs were even more injured than him.

Anonymous No. 189381

>>189380
He has been the big dog in a large part of the post-Hakuho era, since Teru manages to be unhealthier than he is.
His problem is that he just can't be healthy for 3 straight basho.

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Anonymous No. 189382

>>189375

Anonymous No. 189383

>>189377
>sponsors
Wrestlers have nothing to do with the characters in their kouenkai and are strongly encouraged to never speak against them. IIRC both Akebono and Asashouryuu, after getting kicked out, have spoken publicly about hating kouenkai people but not being able to say or do anything about it. See Endou for an obvious example of what happens if you *do* act out against them.

Anonymous No. 189387

>>189383
That was an event with Hakuho present and his name all over it. The perpetrator also tried to extort the poor dude for "meeting with Hakuho".

Anonymous No. 189396

>>189370
>when he is healthy
i see this variety of cope way way too often. staying healthy is part of the game just like staying strong, quick & agile is, those who can't do it, can't do it cause they are bad at the game. butterball is kadoban 3 times a year, he isn't good. nobody wants to see a yoko scoring 8-7s, he would be forced into retirement quickly if he ever made yoko, he is lucky they don't demote him from ozeki for sucking

Anonymous No. 189397

>>189334
Chris is the one who whines about rikishi getting hurt, he's probably the most anti-dohyo raising of any person in this narrative
I understand this is just newfaggotry and forcing a meme to fit in but do try to keep your stories straight

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Anonymous No. 189401

>>189396
>cause they're bad at the game
I don't know anon, I think he's just fat

Anonymous No. 189402

>>189396
The beauty of sumo is that each rikishi gets to decide the amount of risk they are willing to take. This is what makes guys like Ura shine so much next to attendance machines like Tamawashi. The notion that a fucking Ozeki is "bad" just because he's on some shonen gimmick character shit is retarded.

Anonymous No. 189426

>>189342
Chris is sacrificing his dicking down of nip JP cunny for you, and this is how you repay him?

COMMIT SUDDOKU NOW

Anonymous No. 189428

>>189402
keisho is just a shorter, fatter version of abi, he is harder to tip over because he is spherical. he isn't good or special in any way.
that henka in the atamifuji match proves that even he doesn't have any confidence or pride in his brand of sumo

Anonymous No. 189429

>>189377
good, hope the goon squad takes a bat to all the board members and YDC kneecaps

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Anonymous No. 189441

>its another anons seethe about takakeisho's existence episode

he has a wife. she is hotter and better than your hand. lmao

btfo

Anonymous No. 189451

>>189428
>he isn't good or special in any way.
>has held the second highest rank attainable in the sport for almost 5 years straight
>not even 30
Retard

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Anonymous No. 189459

Anonymous No. 189460

>>189451
>not even 30
he actually has 33 wins in his last 6 bashos
33 out of a possible 90
he sucks. he should retire

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Anonymous No. 189461

>>189459
anime is for pedos

Anonymous No. 189467

>>189460
He's literally doing better than the current Yokozuna, who by your retarded metric has only 28 wins in his last 6 bashos. 28 out of his last 8 actually, out of a possible 120. Guess everybody just sucks at sumo.

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Anonymous No. 189477

>>189461
See me in the dohyo, I'll give you the forarm blast tachiai

Anonymous No. 189481

>>189307
>https://poal.me/hkb1no
OK, it's been almost a full day since the poll opened. Looks like JSAchads win with 55% of the vote, all of you Chris acolytes need to go and find another thread.

Anonymous No. 189490

Pre-pec-tear Keisho was the b-b-beast.
Current young gen got nonthing on him.
Can you fucking imagine, at some point the guy was the youngest rikishi in makuuchi, but already an Ozeki.

Anonymous No. 189500

>>189441
His mom is hot

Anonymous No. 189508

>>189451
>has held the second highest rank attainable in the sport for almost 5 years straight

>conveniently leaving out that he's been kadoban every other tournament for the majority of that time

Anonymous No. 189509

>>189508
Yeah and then he comes back and maintains his rank, because he's still capable of Ozeki-level sumo. He hasn't been kadobon for a reason other than leaving due to injury in almost 4 years now, and even then in all but one of those cases he still showed up and tried to fight through it.

Anonymous No. 189510

>>189490
>wins ONE yusho where he's not the highest ranked rikishi (and it's the one where Kisenosato retired after).

Anonymous No. 189512

>>189477
>t. emotionally triggered pedophile

Anonymous No. 189513

>>189509
he won't be able to this time
and if he decides to skip it he won't be able to get 10 next time

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Anonymous No. 189515

>>189512
At least post sumo if you are going to bait in here

Anonymous No. 189517

>>189509
>He hasn't been kadobon for a reason other than leaving due to injury
there is no other reason to be kadoban

Anonymous No. 189522

>>189517
Tell that to Shodai

Anonymous No. 189527

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TO6J9trIgDU

What a fucking salty bitch lmao. And redditors dare to scream that he's getting singled out because of racism.

Anonymous No. 189529

>>189527
why are you reading reddit and concerning yourself with what they have to say to the point of making yourself angry? retards have retarded opinions, this is known, move on

Anonymous No. 189530

>>189527
>hands clearly touching the ground
>did a proper tachiai with a face check to boot
>changed his mind the moment he realized he didn't get the grip
Did Hak have an egoism-induced stroke or what?

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๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ Anonymous No. 189532

>>189529
this is what you look like

Anonymous No. 189536

>>189532
>not reading reddit is reddit
I don't know where you need to go, but it's any place that ain't here, chum

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Anonymous No. 189538

reddit tier
abi
chris
this dude >>189527

4chan
hakuho
aoiyama
the jsa
him >>189529

Anonymous No. 189541

>>189481
Truly, siding with NSK is the sign of a midwit pseud.

>Look at me, I'm so smart because I choose to side with a corporation ran by a bunch of concussed senile retards who got Sumo into the rut it is in right now and refuse to listen to a person with intimate understanding of both Sumo politics and unspoken consensus among the Japanese fans who have been watching Sumo for decades!

sigh...

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Anonymous No. 189549

>leave for 2 weeks
>thread is no longer comfy
>it's just 2-3 autistic retards shitting up the thread, spamming images because mad @ OP, cringe ironic chrisposting and (You) baiting on fucking /xs/
should've gatekeep more

Anonymous No. 189550

>Hakuho strong-arming local politicians for money and favors using yakuza henchmen

He's done for real this time.

Anonymous No. 189566

>>189377
>>189550
The video was deleted.

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Anonymous No. 189567

Hokutofuji's blinding manhood

Anonymous No. 189578

>>189566
>Hakuho's goons threatening poor old man Takatoriki into silence
Reminder: this is who Hakuhofags want to """reform""" sumo.

Anonymous No. 189580

>>189578
It's because that old retard hid certain names while showing parts of the letter but forgot to do so when the entire transcript was on screen.

Anonymous No. 189586

>>189428
If Takakeisho is not good, what does that make everyone not named Terunofuji (who is about as healthy as Takakeisho) who were consistently mogged by Teru and Keisho in the post-Hakuho era?
Kirishima, Hoshoryu, Kotonowaka, Wakatakakage, Wakamotoharu... If Keisho and Teru (given he has the same issues as Keisho) are not good, what does that make of the rest of the division?

Where are the good rikishi? In the amateur tournaments?

Anonymous No. 189588

>>189586
all the good athletes realized what a fail boat sumo is and got into better careers

Anonymous No. 189604

are there any pics of chris sumo out there? i wonder what he looks like. in my mind he could tag team with jason sumo
heโ€™s rewriting the book on youtube sumo coverage, letโ€™s cut him some slack

Anonymous No. 189616

>>189604
He's been posted literally in this thread lad

>>187976

Anonymous No. 189625

>>189586
Takakeisho is held to a higher standard. He made ozeki extremely quickly. Heโ€™s won four cups.

I donโ€™t have the stats in front of me, but I read somewhere that guys who make ozeki that young tend to become Yokozuna more often than not.

Anonymous No. 189627

>>189625
There have been 9 guys to make ozeki before they turned 23 since the end of the Showa period. Of those, 4 never made yokozuna: Takanonami, Chiyotaikai, Kotooshu, and Takakeisho.
So 5/9 is roughly similar to the chance of ozeki making yokozuna to begin with.

Anonymous No. 189628

>>189625
Since Taiho (the start of the modern 6 basho - 15 match era):

8 men made ozeki at or before 24 without making yokozuna (not counting Takakeisho and Hoshoryu, sine theyโ€™re active)

Of the yokozuna promoted since Taiho, 18 made ozeki at 24 or earlier and only 8 were yokozuna first made ozeki at 25 or later.

19 made ozeki after 24 years without making yokozuna, plus 6 active guys who could theoretically still make it.

Anonymous No. 189641

>four ozeki and a Yokozuna
To think we almost had no ozeki if keisho didnโ€™t clear kadoban, who wouldโ€™ve gotten promoted to ozeki at that time wakamotoharu hoshoryu?

Anonymous No. 189642

>>189604
jason is an alright nerdy weebish guy that gives back to the community with contests and shit.

chris is a winny bitch that begs for money like the twitch sumo streamers.

they are not the same

Anonymous No. 189644

>>189481
Why are there so many chris shills lately? I don't understand.

Anonymous No. 189645

>>189644
It's probably just one guy, but someone made the mistake of letting him know he was annoying so now he might just never leave. I've seen spergs like that tank generals before.

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Anonymous No. 189648

I am fighting in an amateur sumo tournament in June. I am not fighting in the heavyweight weight class. How can I defeat my fellow skinny men? I am also comparatively skinny for an amateur sumo participant.

Anonymous No. 189651

>>189648
Henka.
If they also henka, henka again.
Continue henkaing until one of you is the henka champion.

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Anonymous No. 189671

>>187976
Good looking fella, picrel is what anti-Chrisers looks like

Anonymous No. 189672

New chris video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnDp7WwcHxU
Teru is officially in for the 'sho, which means that nobody else has a chance of winning

Anonymous No. 189681

>>189672
If I wanted to be reminded of every single one of Chris' recent videos I'd subscribe to him on youtube, not come here. Stop shilling, Chris

Anonymous No. 189682

>>189672
We just need Tobi to land one good kick

Anonymous No. 189693

>>189672
He was solid and unbeatable in week 2 after he'd got the cobwebs cleaned out last time. He said in his victory speech last time that "training for March starts tomorrow" so he should be even better now given that he only trained for like a week before Hatsu.
He could probably take all 6 this year barring further physical problems, when he is healthy he is a level above everyone else.

Anonymous No. 189694

>>189648
Forearm blast, harite, nodowa, and end with kotenage to fuck their elbow.

Anonymous No. 189695

>>189580
The fact that not even Gendai Shuukan or News Post-Seven have touched whatever this story is is ultimately a strong indication as to the legitimacy/quality of the evidence which really exists. They are ultracharged TMZ, they wouldn't let anything like what is described pass without sinking their claws into it.

Anonymous No. 189699

>>189567
Guess that is why they are called kintama

Anonymous No. 189707

>>189672
Teru hasnโ€™t done very well in back to back tournaments I had teru winning January because thatโ€™s what he does he comes back and wins 1. I expect 11+ this time too but heโ€™s definitely beatable this time around.

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Anonymous No. 189744

>Another day
>Another chrisschizo posting

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Anonymous No. 189745

>There are sumo fans itt with double digit bodyweights

Anonymous No. 189755

>>189745
>not FULL
Too scrawny, please leave.

Anonymous No. 189762

>>189745
What does the pube mean?

Anonymous No. 189764

>>189762
Weighing result is stable.

Anonymous No. 189777

>>189648
lightweight sumo is pretty wild, try and suplex a nigga

Anonymous No. 189778

>>189694
ref told me to take it easy on the harite last time, hope it's not the same dude

Anonymous No. 189784

>>189778
What sort of idiot referee would even think of telling someone not to do his own brand of sumo?

Anonymous No. 189788

Discovered this beauty of a channel.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YH_XD-V6ccA

Anonymous No. 189789

>>189788
yama, fuji, honest mistake

Anonymous No. 189793

Enho is sitting out again

Anonymous No. 189794

>>189793
Poor lad's absolutely done for, there's no way he's getting that final sekitori basho. A Jonidan shitter would break his neck if he fought again.

Anonymous No. 189795

>>189793
I assume because miyagino stable is already on thin ice, the last thing they need is him getting severely injured and adding yet another controversy to their name. Probably told him to sit this one out while things cool down.

Anonymous No. 189805

>>189784
Unfortunately refs in amasumo(japan included) fall that way most of the time. They don't like it when someone's brand of sumo involves handing out concussions or free nose jobs.

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Anonymous No. 189813

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Anonymous No. 189815

>>189604
Even though we know what he looks like, this is how I visualize him. Perhaps a little fatter, paler, and flush in the cheeks (from bearing the weight of his own pretensions).

>>189788
TOTAL GYOJI DEA-
>already in my likes
huh

Anonymous No. 189816

>>189793
>explodes his neck
>let me back in coach, i can do it
>first off i'm your doctor, not your coach, and if you wrestle again you'll probably paralyze yourself
>they told me i'd paralyze myself, but i can do it
>i can't do it
I feel bad for the little guy, but who was he kidding?

Anonymous No. 189817

>>189795
Yeah thats pretty much what Chris said in his latest video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVL88lSh9Bk

Anonymous No. 189818

>>189816
himself

Anonymous No. 189819

>>189817
hang yourself

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Anonymous No. 189820

>>189817

Anonymous No. 189821

Matchups for the first two days are out
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/

Anonymous No. 189840

>>189816
that girlfriend that dumped him truly had the last laugh

Anonymous No. 189844

>>189794
>there's no way he's getting that final sekitori basho
He doesn't need it. 30 is the standard route, but 29 is more than enough to get a kabu. Chikubayama got one with fucking 25.

Anonymous No. 189860

>>189844
True. Especially considering how much publicity Enho game to the sport from the moment he became sekitori.

Anonymous No. 189861

>>189844
Chikubayama (assuming you mean ex-Miyagino) competed under old rules that only required 25 bashos at juryo or a single basho at maegashira. The current rules are 1 basho at sanyaku, or 20 at makuuchi, or 30 at sekitori. Enho has none of those. The rules were slightly relaxed to let Hochiyama inherit Kimigahama, but that was when there were 8 vacant kabu being held by active wrestlers that couldn't even be loaned up due to lack of eligible wrestlers who were willing to retire and hadn't already left the JSA. I doubt Enho would have the same leeway.

Anonymous No. 189864

>>189844
>>189861
There is one further exception for wrestlers who are inheriting a stable, where they only need 12 makuuchi or 20 juryo basho. Enho would qualify for this. However, it would require Hakuho to quit the JSA altogether, and the JSA to allow Enho to both inherit Miyagino and the stable.

Anonymous No. 189867

>>189861
>The current rules are 1 basho at sanyaku, or 20 at makuuchi, or 30 at sekitori
That's still wrong, as you admit about Houchiyama. It's 28 with a guarantor. He wasn't given some one-off exception. Tenkaihou also had 29 and got a kabu in 2019.

and from jp wikipedia:
>2013ๅนด12ๆœˆ20ๆ—ฅใซใ€Œ้–ขๅ–ๅœจไฝ้€š็ฎ—28ๅ ดๆ‰€ไปฅไธŠใชใ‚‰ใ€ๅ่ทกใฎๅ‰ไฟๆœ‰่€…ใจๅธซๅŒ ใ€ไฟ่จผไบบใฎ่ฆชๆ–นใฎ้ก˜ๆ›ธใŒใ‚ใ‚Œใฐใ€็†ไบ‹ไผšใงใใฎๆ˜ฏ้žใ‚’ๆฑบๅฎšใ™ใ‚‹ใ€ใจใ„ใ†่ฆๅฎšใ‚’ๅŒๅนด11ๆœˆ17ๆ—ฅใฎ็†ไบ‹ไผšใง่ฟฝๅŠ ใ—ใฆใ„ใŸใ“ใจใŒ็›ธๆ’ฒๅ”ไผšใ‹ใ‚‰็™บ่กจใ•ใ‚Œใ€้–ขๅ–ๅœจไฝๆœŸ้–“ใซใคใ„ใฆใฏไบ‹ๅฎŸไธŠ2ๅ ดๆ‰€็Ÿญ็ธฎใ•ใ‚ŒใŸใ€‚ใ“ใฎ่ฆๅฎšใซใ‚ˆใ‚Šๅ่ทกใ‚’่ฅฒๅใ—ใŸใฎใฏ2013ๅนด12ๆœˆใฎ11ไปฃๅ›ใƒถๆฟฑ(ๅฏถๅƒๅฑฑๅนธๅ‹˜)ใ€2019ๅนด3ๆœˆใฎ13ไปฃ็ง€ใƒŽๅฑฑ(ๅคฉ้Žง้ตฌ่ฒด็”ฑ่ผ)ใงใ‚ใ‚‹ใ€‚

Anonymous No. 189872

>>189821
>nishikifuji day 1 for teru
This basho is going to be a good one K might as well be m0 itโ€™s a rough rank week 1

Anonymous No. 189881

>>189867
So Enho would therefore need the approval of the current kabu holder, Hakuho (as his master) and also of a separate guarantor? I wouldn't bet on his chances, personally.

Anonymous No. 189890

>>189867
An exception to the rule proves the rule exists in the first place, anon. Otherwise the exception wouldn't be an exception. If Enho felt he had a guarantor and JSA support, then there wouldn't be such a big deal about him trying to get back to sekitori for a 30th tournament.

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Anonymous No. 189914

chances for another 11-4 yusho?

Anonymous No. 189918

>>189914
none whatsoever

Anonymous No. 189919

>>189914
Minimal, seeing as Terry's here this time around and he seems to be in good health

Anonymous No. 189938

>>189914
he will be lucky to KK
he is in mitakeumi's class

Anonymous No. 189940

Takerufuji's career record is 56-8, his Juryo win was only the second time he lost 2 in a basho.
whats his ceiling?
how many does he lose at M17?

Anonymous No. 189943

>>189940
>how many does he lose at M17?
He'll lose at least 6. The options are he does really well, then has to fight tougher opponents, or he'll not do well at all.

Anonymous No. 189985

>>189890
>An exception to the rule proves the rule exists in the first place
It is literally listed as an addendum to the rule. That is why I posted the addendum. It's not an exception (especially given it has happened more than once), it's in black and white.

Anonymous No. 189988

>>189940
11-4

Anonymous No. 189994

>Miyagino closes after this basho
Lel, Hakuholets on suicide watch

Anonymous No. 189995

>>189994
They're closing it? Is he just gonna leave sumo? Why would he want to just be a coach at someone else's stable?

Anonymous No. 189996

>>189994
No one has posted proof of that, it's just Kinta reading the clickbait headline from Nikkan (ๅฎฎๅŸŽ้‡Ž้ƒจๅฑ‹ใŒๆ˜ฅๅ ดๆ‰€ๅพŒใซใ‚‚้–‰้Ž–ใธ) and assuming it's a done deal.
If you actually click on the article it then says
>้–‰้Ž–ใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒๆฟƒๅŽšใจใชใฃใŸใ€‚

I'm not going to assume it's over until it's over.

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Anonymous No. 189997

Anonymous No. 190005

Good news everyone!
Chris has graciously bestowed west another fine helping of sumo news upon us
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLhO9FttgVk

Anonymous No. 190009

I am hearing that Hakuho has been sentenced to death.

Anonymous No. 190011

>>190009
"Your honor:
Hokuseiho"
"Death"

Anonymous No. 190014

Man, they're going to fuck Hakuho in the ass, aren't they?

Anonymous No. 190015

>>190005
Our Chris-sama, who art in Tokyo,
hallowed be thy name;
thy videos come;
thy will be done;
in the West as it is in Nippon.
Give us this day our daily news.
And forgive us our comments,
as we forgive those who comment against us.
And lead us not into temptation;
but deliver us from the JSA.
For thine is the reporting,
the access and the insight,
for ever and ever.
Arigato.

Anonymous No. 190026

x.com/TheSumoSoul/status/1766145021538173348?s=20

Anonymous No. 190075

>>190026
>Testicles A and B were slapped in the face, back, and testicles at the Miyagino stable or local lodgings after around August 2019.
Reading the article, it sounds like the JSA is out to get him while he is trying to circumvent the JSA as much as possible. Looks like hak was on the losing side to the salty jobbers.

Anonymous No. 190086

Weird to think that the basho starts tomorrow, haven't been too hyped for it myself

Anonymous No. 190090

>>189996
>I'm not going to assume it's over until it's over.
This.

Anonymous No. 190093

>>190086
Nobody's eligible for yokozuna or ozeki right now, so it's the usual see if anyone does well and see if Teru/Keisho break down again. The behind the scenes drama this off-season has severely overshadowed anything on the dohyo, which sucks since this is Kotonowaka's ozeki debut.

Anonymous No. 190094

>>189914
lol
lmao

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Anonymous No. 190097

It has begun
2nd half of Jonidan is currently wrestling, Aonishiki should have his contest in about an hour or so.

>>>/sp/139406035

Anonymous No. 190124

>>190009
One more gem by Chris,
Savior of Oozumo.
NSK, watch out!

Anonymous No. 190153

>>186986
>https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d
I'm updating it

>>190097
please use the Rentry pastebin when making new /sp/ threads; thanks!

Anonymous No. 190159

>>189994
crash this bitch with no survivors

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Anonymous No. 190162

>Love Hakuho
>Hate Miyagino
Simple as.

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Anonymous No. 190219

DOSUKOI

Anonymous No. 190286

>>190162
You and everyone except the old men in charge

Anonymous No. 190373

>>190286
What? Seems like they hate Miyagino too.

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Roga vs Hoshoryu ....webm

Anonymous No. 190472

Anonymous No. 190476

>>190472
IPPONZ-AAAAACK

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Ichiyamamoto vs S....webm

Anonymous No. 190507

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Ura vs Hoshoryu S....webm

Anonymous No. 190511

Anonymous No. 190521

>>190511
KaCHADaki Ura

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Anonymous No. 190530

>Hokuseiho OUT
>Hakuoho 3-2 in juryo
>Enho going to maezumo at this rate
Hakuholets on suicide watch

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Fujitoshi vs Asan....webm

Anonymous No. 190931

Anonymous No. 190983

takerufuji next yokozuna. Screenshot this

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Anonymous No. 190995

>>190983
>debutante has a great first basho
>next yokozuna guys!
how many times do we have to teach you this lesson old man?

Anonymous No. 191017

>>190995
hakuohos 6-3 and tobizarus 7-2 aren't the same league as 9-0.

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Akua vs Hakuoho S....webm

Anonymous No. 191022

Anonymous No. 191023

>>190995
can you post the english version? I cant read it

Anonymous No. 191024

>>191022
The Akua classic aside from falling on his neck

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Ura vs Asanoyama ....webm

Anonymous No. 191025

Anonymous No. 191058

>>189645
me too, the way we got rid of them was by making a discord

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Asakลryลซ vs Mitor....webm

Anonymous No. 191096

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Datenomori Vs. Ur....webm

Anonymous No. 191097

Anonymous No. 191103

That Meisei vs Asanoyama was a good one

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Meisei vs Asanoya....webm

Anonymous No. 191124

>>191103

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Asahikuni Sumo Uc....webm

Anonymous No. 191127

Anonymous No. 191142

>>190995
>taiho: 12โ€“3 JY kanto-sho
>musashimaru: 11-4 kanto-sho
>hakuho: 12โ€“3 kanto-sho
>kitanofuji: 13-2 kanto-sho
>wakanohana I:11-4 kanto-sho
>konishiki I: 8-0-1 Y

Anonymous No. 191147

>>190511
>Beats all the ozeki
>fucking looses to everybody else afterwards
Being an Ura fan is pain

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Anonymous No. 191188

>>191147
>Being an Ura fan is pain
Not if you do two things:
1. Appreciate the unique aesthetics he brings to his matches, regardless of result.
2. Always have hope.

If you do this, you will enjoy (almost) every Ura match. Just not the ones where he gets blasted out in literally one second.

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Ama vs Goeido Sum....webm

Anonymous No. 191215

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Harumafuji vs Asa....webm

Anonymous No. 191216

Anonymous No. 191280

not only will takorofooji be the next yokozuno, he will be the most dominant yokozuno the sport has ever witnessed. Screenshot this

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Takerufuji vs Hos....webm

Anonymous No. 191296

Anonymous No. 191306

>>191296
fucking embarrassing. What a disappointment. Its over, its actually fucking over

Anonymous No. 191324

ura v tobi, what I expected to be chaos vs chaos, was pretty tame

Anonymous No. 191336

>>191296
the ref almost got smoked lmao

Anonymous No. 191530

That was fast

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Anonymous No. 191536

New thread
>>191535
>>191535
>>191535
>>191535